


Living Like a Freaking Happy Family

by Sohama



Series: Family [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Dean feels lost, Fluff and Angst, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, M/M, Sibling Incest, Teen Sam Winchester, Top Sam, settling down
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-23
Updated: 2018-08-06
Packaged: 2018-11-04 04:58:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 28,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10983849
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sohama/pseuds/Sohama
Summary: John killed the Yellow-Eyed Demon. The Winchester's mission is done. So John brings his boys to Kate and Adam to try and have a normal family.However, Sam and Dean don't know how to live normally. They've been on the run all their lives. They know how to kill a monster in fifty different ways. They don't know how they're supposed to let John and Kate take care of them. They don't know how to stop looking over their shoulder.But they have each other and that's not going to change.(This is the version with a top Sam after some requests)





	1. Annoucement

Sam and Dean haven’t seen their dad in a bit more than a month now. Nothing too unusual, really. John, when he leaves, tends to stay away for long periods of time and he always comes back. Because if there is something to be sure of, it’s that the Winchesters are the _best_ at what they do. So they don’t worry.

Or, more accurately, they don’t worry _outwardly_. Dean stays the same confident guy that he is. He works hard at the garage and he keeps an eye out for Sam. He doesn’t even try to contact John. Not yet.

But Sam can see through him. After all, why the heck would Dean religiously come back to their shitty apartment well before nine o’clock? Why isn’t he out, banging whoever caught his eye for some quick fun?

The way Dean acts sets Sam on edge. He’s already scared that something happened to their dad. But with Dean on top? The only thing Sam can do is study, study and study. It keeps his mind off of possibilities. And if it annoys Dean? Well, fuck, they bicker and that also helps them think of other stuff than what’s really going on.

Where’s John Winchester?

***

Sam is sitting at the kitchen’s table, multiple books opened in front of him. He very consciously spreads as much as he can, knowing that Dean, who is trying to make some pasta on the stove, is very close from snapping at Sam.

The youngest brother pulls a hand through his too long hair and casually puts his legs on the chair just beside him. The movement makes the chair scrap on the floor.

Dean’s shoulders immediately tense up a bit more and Sam’s eyes settle on the movement.

_Not enough, huh?_

Sam looks back at his homework, pretending to concentrate. Honestly, the math problem would have been solved twenty minutes ago; it was so easy. But then, Sam truly wouldn’t have anything else to do and, and… No. He has to bother Dean.

So he takes his pen and he starts taping it on the table. He doesn’t keep a specific rhythm, knowing that when it’s irregular, it’s just that much more annoying. Sam slowly counts the time in his head, wondering how long it’s going to take Dean to react.

He has to stop himself from grinning when, barely a minute later, Dean slaps the fork he was using on the counter and turns to fix Sam with a death glare. Now, if Sam was anyone else than, well, himself, he would probably be pissing himself right now. But this is Dean, his big brother. The one who showed him how to tie his shoes. The one that has fed him every single freaking day. The one that taught him how to fight monsters.

Sam might have some unhealthy hero worship thing going on.

“Sammy, I swear I’m going to shove the fork down your throat if you don’t stop,” Dean threatens the teenager.

Sam keeps his expression soft and pulls out his puppy eyes. Purely innocent. “Stop what?” he asks.

Dean’s eyes narrow dangerously. “Don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing, bitch. You’re being a little shit and you know it. If I were you, I’d stop right now, ‘cause you know I’m going to get revenge.”

Sam can’t help the twitch of his lips and Dean definitely sees it. The eldest brother turns back to his pasta, watching the water boil.

“Do your homework, brat,” he mutters. He doesn’t want to get dragged into whatever Sam is doing. He’s twenty-one, dammit! He’s not getting riled up by a seventeen year-old!

“But I’m bored,” Sam says as he pushes his chair back, letting it stand on two legs. “And I’m pretty much done anyway.”

Dean throws a glance over his shoulder, slightly amused despite himself. Sam has always been really smart, always had good grades. Not like Dean. He dropped out of school as soon as he could, knowing it wouldn’t do any good anyway. What’s a diploma when you’re a hunter? Just a piece of fucking useless paper.

But Sam… well, Dean is pretty sure that Sam can get out of this crazy life. Heck, Dean almost hopes his brother actually does it. After all, if he has the grades… he could probably get a scholarship.

“Finally. Man, you’ve been studying like crazy lately. I’d have shot myself if I had to study so much in high school.”

Sam snorts as Dean removes the pasta from the stove. “Liar. You’d just have said, fuck this, and then you’d have tried to convince the smartest girl in your class to ‘have some fun’ with you.”

Dean pulls out the strainer and removes all the water. “What’s wrong with a little fun?”

Sam lets his chair fall back properly on the floor. Like every single time they’re talking about Dean’s habits with girls, he feels… something. Uneasy. Yeah, he’s uneasy. Probably because he knows he wouldn’t ever treat any girl that way. Not that he would want to ‘have fun’ with any girl in the first place. Whatever. Not like Dean or their dad knows any of this.

So Sam just shrugs his shoulders and the subject drops. Silence falls heavily in the kitchen. Which sucks. Sam tries to think of something to say, anything, because for a few minutes, both of them were fine. They didn’t think about John and, and… it was perfect.

But now, worry churns in his belly.

Sam quickly finishes his homework as Dean seasons the pasta.

“Get your stuff off the table,” the eldest brother mutters as he sets the meal into two bowls.

Sam does as asked. He quickly gathers his books, papers and pens and set them in a corner on the table where it won’t bother anyone.

Dean sets the bowls down with two forks. “Voilà,” he says, his face blank as he sits down.

Sam looks at the meal and sighs. Christ. Fucking Kraft Dinner. He sincerely wonders if he’s going to be able to keep the macaroni and cheese down. He’s _that_ disgusted by the meal. “Again?” he asks weakly.

Dean gets this expression on his face and Sam understands that he better shut up and eat the damn food. The teen still wants to live so he picks up his fork. And, anyway, he’s not stupid. He knows that Dean doesn’t buy the nasty food just to see Sam squirm. Dean probably hates the stuff as much as him, but money is always tight. Especially when their dad leaves for long periods of time.

 So they eat in silence. They’re both almost finished, lost in their thoughts, when they hear the front door opening and closing.

Immediately, Sam and Dean jump up on their feet and run to the entry, food forgotten. There stands their dad with his usual duffle bag. The man, as soon as he sees his sons, smiles.

The two brothers feel relieved. Deeply relieved that their dad is back. Sam, however, also feels frustrated. Angry, even. Their dad leaves for more than a month and the man just stands there like nothing is wrong?

He’s about to open his mouth and say something about how worried they were, but his dad is faster.

“Pack your bags,” John says heavily, sounding and looking tired suddenly.

The order, however, is clear. So Sam bites his tongue as he and Dean jump into motion. Used to having to pack their things quickly, they’re ready to leave the shitty apartment five minutes later. Sam and Dean rapidly put their bags in the Impala, knowing that, if there’s a threat close, they have to move.

But… their dad is actually too slow. John takes his time, not rushing anything. He isn’t running to put his duffle bag in the car and that’s just… weird. Sam and Dean glance at each other, both unsure what’s going on.

“Dad?” Dean eventually asks.

John packs his bag in the trunk before facing his sons. His face is a strange mixture of happy, weary and disbelieving. Sam and Dean haven’t ever seen their dad as expressive as in this moment. It throws them a bit.

“It’s done. We’re done, boys. I’ve done it,” John says and it sounds… like… the man is actually rambling a bit, which doesn’t make any sense. Sam is starting to freak out.

“What do you mean?” Dean asks slowly, unused to having to ask his dad to be clearer. Normally, John tells him what he needs to know. Nothing less and nothing more.

“The Yellow-Eyed Demon. He’s dead,” John announces.

Sam feels his eyes popping open in surprise. He can hardly believe it. And Dean, well, he feels like the rug has just been pulled out from under his feet.

They can only think of one thing.

What now?


	2. This Is Where You Live Now

They all climb in the Impala. John behind the wheel, Dean shot-gun and Sam in the back. So normal, but then again, everything is wrong.

They drive away from the town in silence for a few hours. The shock is great for Sam and Dean, they’re still stuck on the announcement.

Sam… well, there’s a part of him that’s glad that the demon is gone for good. He always hated living on the road. Hated to repeat the process of getting into a new school, meeting new people, hunting things with his dad on occasions, training all the time. Now… now they have a shot at normal, right?

Dean, however, hasn’t moved or said anything since they entered the car. In fact, he holds himself as immobile as possible and it worries Sam a bit. Usually, Dean talks loudly with their dad and he’ll play with the sound of the radio. Now, he isn’t even… twitching.

It’s terrible. Sam doesn’t even know what to do. Should he say something? He feels that he should be harassing his dad for answers. After all, he’s never scared of giving his opinion normally. But… he has a hard time breathing, which doesn’t bode well. It’s like there isn’t enough air in the car.

“Where are we going?” Dean eventually asks slowly, startling Sam.

The teen sits up straighter at the sound of his brother’s voice. The question has been at the back of his mind but… yeah. He didn’t speak up. Sam is starting to realise that he hasn’t said anything yet because he’s scared. They’re right in front of the unknown, Sam and Dean. There never has been anything _planned_ for after the mission. It’s like the mission was their life goal, their duty, their reason for being, and now that it’s accomplished… there’s nothing in front of them. Nothing but a black void.

John sighs tiredly but he keeps his eyes steady on the road as he answers. “We’re going to Kate’s. She’s a woman I’ve been seeing for the last few years.”

At those words, a sharp pain pierces Sam in the chest. Betrayal. That’s betrayal he’s feeling. And if the way Dean’s head snaps to their dad indicates anything, then Sam isn’t the only one to feel that way. Because, when has John ever found the time, time that he never seems to have for his own sons, to hang out with this _Kate_?

“You’ll also meet your half-brother, Adam,” John adds, as if oblivious to the tension in the car.

“What?” Dean blurts out, sounding completely different than what he usually does. Vulnerable. Sam is too shocked to even open his mouth.

John quickly glances at his boys, his face neutral, closed-off. “You have a half-brother. His name is Adam and I expect you to be nice to him and Kate, is that understood?”

Sam and Dean both stay silent for a few seconds. They can’t believe this is actually happening. Sam, especially, can’t understand why their dad would hide something this big for _years_.

But the order in their dad’s voice was clear. “Yes, sir,” Dean answers, the tone of his voice oddly dead.

Sam feels something churn painfully in his stomach but he also answers. “Yes, sir.”

He hates seeing Dean look this defeated, though, fuck, he understands. Sam probably looks the same. But he wants to… to take some of the pain away if it’s possible. Make Dean invincible again. Which would probably mean talking about _feelings_ and spitting out their guts on the table. Dean isn’t very fond of that.

But Sam will try of course. If only to talk about his own feelings at least. But later, when their dad isn’t there.

***

The Winchester family arrives at the Milligan’s early the next morning. None of them slept, which has to show on their faces.

As they all walk to the porch, Sam can’t help but notice the way John has a spring in his steps, like he’s anxious to get into this new life. Completely different from Dean who looks like he’s about to be let out without his weapons in a cage full of starving vampires.

Sam… well. He hasn’t spoken since. He doesn’t know how he should handle the situation. Go along? Don’t go along? Stay silent and observe? Should he stay neutral? Whatever he should do, it probably doesn’t involve feeling betrayed. He should probably just shrug it off, but… he knows he won’t be able to. He’s angry. Sad. And scared. And he knows that the emotions aren’t going to go away easily.

So he walks closer to Dean and his brother does the same. Somehow, they know that it’s just the two of them now. They catch the eye of the other as their dad knocks on the door and the promise is clear.

_I’ve got your back._

They wait a few seconds before a woman opens the door. Kate. She looks tired at first. She’s still in her pyjamas and she’s clutching a cup of coffee in her hands like she’s in desperate need of it. But as soon as she sees John, the sleep in her posture seems to disappear completely.

“John?” she asks, surprise clear in her tone.

Sam can hear the smile in his dad’s voice. “Hey, Kate. As I promised… I’m here.”

“For good?” she asks, sounding almost too hopeful.

“Yeah,” the man reassures her.

Kate’s eyes fill and she jumps into John’s arms, careful not to spill her drink. They both hug for a long time, clearly caught in the moment.

“Oh God… Oh God,” Kate repeats a few times as she sobs into John’s chest.

Sam and Dean stand awkwardly behind, like the outsiders they are. They aren’t used to this sort of situation. They don’t know what to say or what to do, so they don’t move. Sam completely freezes when he hears someone running in the house. Dean’s hand discreetly goes to the back of his jeans, where he hid a gun, but he drops his arm when a young boy appears behind Kate.

“Mom? Dad?” the boy, Adam, asks disbelievingly before he smiles. He then runs into John and Kate, hugging them close to him. “Dad! You’re here!”

“Hey, buddy!” John says with a laugh and it breaks Sam’s heart when his dad puts his arm around Adam. Why is it so easy for John to hug those people and not Sam and Dean? The teen can’t remember the last time John showed him this much affection. Either to him or to his brother. Heck, especially Dean! The most they both get is maybe a smile or a pat on the shoulder.

Irritated, he clears his throat to interrupt the moment. Dean elbows him in the ribs, showing that he isn’t impressed with his little brother. However, Sam knows Dean and the blow wasn’t hard enough to really be a reprimand. It makes him want to smile viciously.

Meanwhile, Kate and Adam finally back off of their dad. The boy seems a bit unsure about their presence but Kate clearly recognizes them. She quickly wipes the tears from her face and she grins.

“Dean and Sam, right?” she asks rhetorically. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”

The brothers glance at each other, a bit destabilised. But then, John glares at his sons and the message is clear: be polite and talk to her!

The time between Sam’s reply and Kate’s comment is a beat too long and the mother’s smile slips a bit from her face. “Nice to meet you too, ma’am,” he quickly reassures her.

It seems to do the trick. Kate brightens at Sam’s manners. “Oh dear, just call me Kate, all right? You too, Dean.”

Sam watches as his brother gives her a nod and his patented polite façade. Because he has lived with Dean for so long in close quarters, Sam knows that the man isn’t polite because he wants to be. He also knows that Dean is undoubtedly thinking mean things about her and Adam.

Thankfully, the Milligans don’t notice anything and John… well he doesn’t know Dean like Sam knows him. He doesn’t see the glint of rebellion in Dean’s posture.

“Sure,” Sam says.

Kate smiles more broadly though she seems to be a bit nervous. Adam clearly senses it because he hides behind his mother. “Good! Now how about you guys go get your luggage and we’ll settle you in?”

Sam looks at the duffle bag he’s holding, feeling a bit uncomfortable. This is just a reminder of the unusual life they have. _Had_. Just a reminder of how they don’t fit. It’s so weird… Didn’t Sam use to hope for this kind of life? To settle down and worry about grades and coming out and potential boyfriends? Now he just… doesn’t know.

“We have everything right here,” John eventually answers when Sam and Dean keep silent.

Kate briefly looks disturbed as she glances at the bags the brothers are holding, like she can’t believe this is all they have. But she quickly erases the expression from her face, trying to look as inviting as possible.

“Well then! How about I show you your room?” she says as she leads the way back inside the house. Adam follows Kate very closely and John does the same. Sam and Dean keep a healthy distance, closing the door behind them. “I’m sorry, I only have a room for you two, you’ll have to share,” she adds, looking genuinely apologetic.

“That’s fine,” Dean reassures her, sounding awkward. “We’ve been sharing all our lives.”

Sam simply nods, affirming what his brother just said. He actually likes it better that way. Honestly, separate rooms at this point would be weird. He’s used to falling asleep to the sound of Dean’s breathing and, occasionally, when they didn’t have enough money to even have two beds, to the warmth of his brother’s body. Being alone, no noise, no stray foot, no late night talking… it would be the cherry on the top, he thinks. He would explode.

Kate urges her son to prepare for school and Adam does so grudgingly after giving another hug to John. The mother then leads them to the guest room quickly after that.

Sam barely notices how nice the house actually is as they walk down the corridors. The walls are only splashes of white or pale tan, so different from the cheap motels and apartments. That’s all he can see. When they finally stand in front of the guest room, Sam forces himself to pear inside, knowing that Kate expects them to do so. Plus, the woman clearly wants their approval. But, honestly? The room could have had the most outrageous décor, he wouldn’t have cared. Neither would Dean.

“Is this fine?” Kate asks nervously as she enters the room. She gestures to the double bed with the gray and black covers, the nightstand and the dark curtains. “I have a mattress in the basement that we could bring up. We’ll have to buy a bed frame, of course. If it’s too cramped, I can always turn the office into another room. It’ll probably be cramped… You’re both so tall after all! And, at your age, you probably want to have some privacy, huh?”

John walks to Kate and he puts his arm around her shoulders. He smiles at her. “It’s perfectly fine, Kate. Calm down. We do realise we’re a bit last minute, don’t worry about the details. We’re going to take care of everything, all right?”

John then gives a quick glance at Sam and Dean, clearly saying that they should reassure her too. Sam is a bit dumbfounded, same as his brother. Since when do they have to reassure people?

But Sam just does as asked, probably because he’s so out of depth that following orders is the only thing that makes sense right now. He enters the room and drops his duffle bag beside the bed. Dean quickly does the same before turning to Kate.

“Thanks a lot, ma’am,” he says.

Kate’s lips twitch upwards. “Okay… good. Call me by my name though, will you?”

“Yes,” Dean replies stiffly.

Kate definitely sees how uncomfortable Dean is, but she lets the subject drop as she disentangles herself from John. “Well, I have to prepare for work. I’ll be back around four o’clock with Adam. You’ll all be fine until I come back?”

“Of course,” John answers with a bright smile.

“Perfect. And make yourselves comfortable, okay? Don’t be strangers,” she says before leaving the guest room. Which is now Sam and Dean’s room. John simply looks at his sons for a few seconds before following Kate out.

They’re finally alone.

Sam quickly closes the door before turning back to Dean.

“What the fuck?” Dean whisper-shouts, looking completely horrified.

Sam walks to his brother, unsure how to reassure the man. “I don’t know…” he whispers back.

But Dean is in a rant. “What the fuck? There’s a boy! We have another brother! What the heck! How long has dad been hiding him for? And Kate? Jesus Christ! Is this a fucking joke?”

Sam has never seen Dean this uncontrolled. Dean always tries to be so strong and… well he also tries to be manliest man around. He never voices his doubts or his fears. He keeps everything inside and he ignores everything that’s wrong quite effectively.

But if Sam feels like the carpet has been tugged from under his feet… he can’t imagine how Dean is feeling. Because, Dean? He has always been the good soldier. He’s the one that listens to the orders without asking any questions. He’s the one that was prepared to live the hunter life and see the mission to the end. Fuck! He was probably ready to die on a hunt! And now, their dad has just thrown all he knows out the window like it was garbage.

So Sam, for the first time in… years most probably, tugs Dean close to him and hugs the man, feeling like they might need it. He doesn’t know what else to do.

“Breathe, okay?” Sam says, trying to be strong for Dean, though he’s not sure he’s doing a good job. “We’re a team and we’re going to get through this. We’ll lay low and gather info for now, all right?”

Dean seems to calm down at the words. Sam isn’t sure if it’s the reassurance or the hunter talk, but, really, all that matters is that it works.

Quickly, Dean steps back from Sam. He’s looking anywhere that isn’t his little brother, clearly embarrassed about his little meltdown. “Yeah… sorry. And thanks. Anyway, I should be asking about you. How you holding up?”

Typical Dean. Always worry about other people before himself. It almost makes Sam smile. Instead, he shrugs. “Well, you know…”

And he does know. Sam doesn’t need to say anything else. Dean is the one to tug Sam in a hug this time around. And if they stay like this for an obscenely long time? Well, they honestly don’t give a crap.


	3. Eating Together

That evening, Kate insists that they all eat together in the dining room. Exactly like the families on TV. They’re all sitting properly at a real, sturdy table, which is a first for the Winchester brothers. There’s even a tablecloth! Oh, and the food? It doesn’t come from a box or a can. From scratch, Kate made pasta. _Real_ pasta.

Sam, when a plate is put in front of him, discreetly smells the food, oddly feeling… unsure. He waits until everyone is served and seated before finally twirling the spaghetti around his fork and taking a bite. His eyes close as the flavour bursts into his mouth. He hasn’t ever eaten anything as good as this. The sauce, a mix of tomatoes and cream and cheese, melts in his mouth and it’s just… it’s awesome.

“Again?” comes the whiny voice of Adam.

Sam opens his eyes. His gaze settles briefly on Dean, who seems to be having the same amazing experiment as him, before he looks over at the young boy. Adam is slumped in his seat, looking slightly disgusted.

“What’s wrong, sweetie?” Kate asks after swallowing her bite.

“You said yesterday that you were going to make steak for tonight! You promised!” the boy complains.

Kate looks slightly embarrassed before answering. “Well, I didn’t have enough meat for everybody. And today is special, right? Your dad is staying for good and you’re meeting your big brothers for the first time. So I decided that I would make my very best recipe.”

Adam’s face twists a bit, like he’s not happy but he does see some logic in there. “I guess…” he says shyly.

That’s when John finally intervenes. “Come on, Adam. Your mother made very good food. Eat up.”

Adam pouts a bit but does as asked. Meanwhile, Sam and Dean look at each other, completely surprised. How many times has their father ordered them to eat the food even if it was barely edible? Too many times. But not the way John just told Adam. No. That was kind. John even had a tiny smile!

When he told Sam and Dean to eat… it was a sharp order. With a glare. This is definitely more than unfair. But, of course, they don’t say a word. They simply eat, their eyes fixed on their plate.

***

Kate clears her throat, feeling some tension in the air. “So! I hope everything was fine today?”

Thankfully, the change of subject makes the air more breathable. Adam jumps on the opportunity to talk to his father about the amazing day he had at school and John’s boys seem to relax a bit by the way they both silently sigh.

Kate takes the time to watch the brothers a bit more closely. She’s very glad to finally meet them of course. Ever since she learned that John had older boys, she has been very curious about them, especially since John talks about them with pride. She was told that Dean is the eldest, is very courageous and protective of his brother. Sam is apparently very smart and inquisitive.

It is too soon to make her own idea and judge their characters. These traits she knows of them are just what she has been told, but… somehow… there’s something about them…

They look hurt. No, scratch that, they look _miserable_. Kate, for the life of her, doesn’t know what to do, doesn’t understand. She would need to know what the problem is in the first place, but she gets the impression that the boys won’t open up to her. Not now anyway and it’s completely normal, she tells herself.

They’re both in unknown territory. They haven’t had a mother figure for most of their lives. Or, more precisely, _all_ their lives. They probably don’t know how to approach her and she doesn’t blame them. She’s going to let them have some space so that they can figure things out.

But… the weird glances they keep giving each other are setting her on edge. It’s as if they’re speaking in their own secret signs. And they often have this confused look on their faces, like… like when she said she wanted them all to eat together in the dining room. They looked at each other as if they couldn’t possibly understand why she would want to have a family meal.

Most disturbing right now is how they’re eating the food. They’re both taking small bites and they are chewing for an eternity before finally swallowing! Do they hate it so much?

“Boys,” she says gently, trying not to disturb Adam in his tale. “If you don’t like it, you’re not obligated to eat it. I can make something else…” Gosh she just wants them to be happy and fine…

However, their reactions surprise her. Dean immediately clutches his plate like he’s afraid she’s going to take it away while Sam looks confused, slightly out of his depth and lost.

“No, ma’am,” Dean eventually says, his eyes still fixed on his plate. “Uh… Kate. We’re fine.”

Sam immediately nods at that. A bit frantically. “Yeah, it’s really good actually. I’ve never had pasta as good as this,” he says and as if to prove his point, he takes another bite.

“Oh, well, thanks,” she replies, surprised.

She lets the matter go and simply continues eating while still watching them. With how honest Sam sounds, she knows he isn’t lying. But… it’s weird. She knows she isn’t a great cook. The meal tastes just fine, not otherworldly, even if she did put in her best effort.

So how come they eat like this is heaven? She realises that they eat the way they do because they _love_ it.

Something is wrong with those boys…

***

Dean sees how Kate is watching them. He isn’t stupid. She’s studying them as mush as they are studying her and it sets him on edge. But he’s not going to let her find anything if he can help it. He’s good at what he does after all.

So once they all finish their meal and Adam escapes, Dean quickly gathers the plates before standing up. He kicks Sam in the shin, but the kid is already up and taking the few forks left on the table.

“Oh dear! You don’t have to do this!” Kate objects.

She’s about to rise from her chair when John puts a hand on her arm, stopping her movement. She looks at him. “It’s fine, Kate. We’re family now and it’s normal to help around the house.”

Kate’s purses her lips, like she’s doesn’t agree. “You just came this morning. It’s fine to take a few days to settle in,” she says quietly.

John assures her it’s okay once more while Sam and Dean make their way to the kitchen. Kate doesn’t stop them this time.

Dean breathes a bit easier. Then, he puts the plates down on the counter, fills the sink with water before pouring soap in it. Sam opens the cupboards and drawers in search of a dishtowel. Once set, they work quickly and efficiently, more than used to this particular task.

After this weird supper, Dean is more than happy to be alone with the only person that’s on the same wave length as him, even if it’s while washing dishes. It soothes his nerves. Unfortunately, the peace doesn’t last long because Kate joins them in the kitchen. Dean scowls, his eyes fixed on the plate he’s holding. He quickly glances at Sam, only to see that he isn’t the only one that’s annoyed. Honestly, what is that woman trying to do?

“Here, let me help you,” she kindly says to Sam as she takes the plates and forks that are dried to put them away. “You know, you could have just put everything in the dishwasher.”

Yeah, right. And show at the same time that they don’t have a freaking idea how it works. Sure. Dean likes looking like a fucking idiot. “It’s fine… Quicker.”

Kate nods her head, clearly disgruntled by the short answer. She doesn’t let Dean’s attitude stop her however. “Well, thank you… You really didn’t have to… Anyway, since tomorrow we’re all going to be here, what do you think about looking for schools? I know there are a couple colleges around and there’s a very nice high school just next town.”

Sam fidgets at that before he forces his body to hold itself more casually. Dean has the same reaction and so he understands what’s going on in his little brother’s head. They’re not used to have someone looking out for them and they don’t like it. Dean is the one that took care of them and he’s not about to let this woman take this away from him.

“I already signed Sam in the nearest high school and I’m a dropout,” he says a bit more aggressively than he probably should as he hands over a plate to his brother. But honestly, fuck this shit. No one’s going to baby them and he certainly isn’t going to let Kate make decision for Sam. They’re both independent and proud to be this way. “I found a job in a garage. I start Monday.”

“Oh…” Kate breathes, sounding dissatisfied. “That was so fast… I didn’t know you boys were so busy today…”

Dean grunts, not caring. For a few seconds, the kitchen falls into blessed silence and the brothers enjoy the moment.

“How come you dropped out? School is so important…” Kate eventually says, breaking the shaky peace.

Dean can’t believe they’re having this conversation right now. Worse, having this conversation with _Kate_ of all people! He doesn’t even talk about this shit with Sam! But then Sam jabs him in the ribs and Dean knows that his brother wants him to answer the question. Probably because there's something he wants to know about Kate or whatever.

Fuck his life… “I’m not as smart as Sammy. I couldn’t keep up when we moved around so much, so I stopped going to school.”

“But now you have a stable home,” Kate tells him sincerely. “Why not get your GED?”

What use would it be? Dean is a hunter. He doesn’t need to take some useless classes. Better yet, he doesn’t need to specialize in anything that is school related! He knows the basic. He can count, write and he knows some science. What else does he need?

This is irritating. Kate is irritating. Dean lets go of the fork and sponge he’s holding to pin the woman with a glare. Instantly, she takes a step back.

“Look, lady,” Dean starts to say when a sudden pain in his stomach makes him lose his breath. A hand instinctively moves to protect his abdomen as he looks at his brother who’s standing there like nothing happened. The fire in Sam’s eyes is unmistakable though. The fucking little traitor punched him.

“Oh my God! Sam! Don’t hit Dean!” Kate cries as she quickly marches towards Dean, probably so that she can have a look at the injury.

Dean doesn’t let her get close enough though. No way is he letting her check him over for a stupid little punch. And anyway, she’s too annoying. He doesn’t want her to touch him, the thought makes his skin crawl. “It’s fine, it’s fine!” he says quickly so that she’ll stop moving. He even lets his hand drop and he stands taller, proving to her that it doesn’t hurt anymore.

Kate hesitates, but she seems to understand that Dean wants his space. “Are you sure?”

Dean nods vigorously, which makes Sam snicker. But, apparently, it wasn’t the thing to do.

Kate turns to look at Sam with disbelief in her eyes. “Why are you laughing? You could have seriously hurt your brother!”

Sam’s eyebrow scrunch together in a frown. “Uh… Well, yeah. If I hit hard enough, but I’m not going to hit that hard.”

And that is not the thing to say either. Kate’s face turns slightly red and Dean sees the anger in her expression quite clearly. “You don’t know that! All it takes is an accident and Dean could be in the hospital!” she says harshly before she suddenly freezes. She turns white. “But I know I’m not your mother and I can’t tell you what to do… Sorry. Still this is my house, and… please don’t hit anyone.”

“Um… That seems fair,” Sam says slowly. “I promise I’ll be careful.”

Kate nods, looking uncomfortable. She doesn’t even look at Dean or Sam. “Thanks… I guess… Goodnight.”

She quickly leaves the kitchen like she can’t stand to be with them anymore. Sam and Dean look at each other, surprised and confused about what happened. That is, until Sam punches Dean in the sternum.

“What was that for?!” Dean asks as he tries to catch his breath. He’s still winded from the first hit.

Sam makes a face, displeased. “Fuck you. I ask you to do one thing, to make her talk and you have to get angry. Thank God we’re not on a dangerous case.”

Dean huffs, annoyed. “Well you’re the one that hit me. Twice!”

Sam is unimpressed as he neatly folds the dishtowel and places it on the counter. “Fine. I guess I could have been more diplomatic but you were going to blow this to hell anyway.”

Dean rolls his eyes. Fucking kid always needs to have the last word. Somehow, instead of irritating him, it makes a smile want to appear on Dean’s face. But then, he does have some pride, so Dean quickly wipes his hands to hide his reaction before he leaves the kitchen to head to their room. Sam follows without a word.


	4. Terrible Morning

Kate left the brothers in such a rush the previous night that she forgot about the second mattress. Not that Sam or Dean cared when they went to sleep. They just climbed together in the same bed, an arrangement they’ve had since they were small.

Like always, they kept to their side of the mattress, knowing they’ll wake up invading the other’s space, and they both fell asleep almost immediately.

So Sam doesn’t understand what’s different this time around. He’s used to this situation. Used to share. Used to the hot flesh next to his. Used to the sound of Dean’s soft breath. It’s all just so _familiar_ and _normal_. Even comfortable, he could say.

But he slits his eyes open at some point in the night, his sleep disrupted, only to find that it’s not even four AM yet. He grunts quietly in annoyance, shutting his eyes closed. He’s tired. Really tired. Why the heck is he even conscious?

He gets the answer to his question when Dean twitches his leg, which Sam is apparently straddling. Immediately, Sam feels something like pleasure coil in his stomach as his cock throbs. He doesn’t even try to understand how they both ended in this particular position, with Dean’s arm under his head. He just enjoys the moment, his sleepiness clouding his morality and judgement.

Sam rocks sluggishly against Dean’s thigh, reveling in the sensation it gives him. His breath escapes him in a soft moan as he repeats the motion a few times. However, each movement slowly brings him closer and closer to being fully awake. Eventually, he realises that he’s basically humping his brother. Upon that discovery, he first feels a flash of deep lust pulse inside of him.

It’s _Dean_. The person he loves most. The only one that truly understands him.

But with that, brutal reality crashes into Sam. He quickly forgets the good feeling coursing through his body. Or, at least, he does his best to ignore it. Dean is his _brother_. He can’t even begin to explain how wrong it is to get aroused by Dean.

Annoyed with himself, Sam twists away from the other man. His brain wants him to freak out at the moment. It wants to bring some sense to what has just happened and berate him. Sam even notices that Dean’s breathing changed, indicating that his brother might not have been as unconscious as he thought.

_This is crazy! Wake the fuck up and explain, you dumb fuck!!_

But Sam doesn’t find it in himself to care. He’s too tired. So he settles himself, gets comfortable in his corner of the bed and he lets sleep drag him under.

***

Okay. So. Dean knows about what happened last night. When… when Sam turned into an incestuous pervert. Fuck. And clearly, Dean isn’t too happy about it either.

Strangely, they never had to deal with this sort of situation. Sure, they both wake up with morning wood. But, heck, what kind of teenager or young man doesn’t? It’s natural. And, fine, Sam was a bit shy the first few times he woke up with an erection, like, an eternity ago. He tried to hide it, but Dean didn’t care then and he doesn’t care now. So long as they kept their dicks to themselves, right?

He never lost control of himself like that. Neither did his brother. Even better, they both might have had some wet dreams, but very, _very_ few of them. Two for him and three for Dean. Not so bad, right? An embarrassed look, a quick clean-up and that was it. End of the story.

But this? Rubbing himself on Dean like an animal? Fucking hell… Sam doesn’t know how to deal with this. He’s very confused. He can’t ignore that he _liked_ it, that he wanted to do more than that. So many unwanted questions are suddenly popping into his head, it’s making him dizzy with panic.

Dean, on the other hand, seems to have one simple goal in mind. Making Sam suffer.

“Come on!” Dean says encouragingly, though Sam can hear the deadly bite behind the words. “You can do ten more, can’t you?”

Sam grunts, completely miserable. Dean woke him up with a loud smack on the chest at six in the morning and with the announcement that they were going to train. Nothing too unusual. A good run around town, some squats and a few spars in the backyard… But then Dean has been pushing him beyond his limits in every exercises. Sam quickly understood that this is payback for his lost of control.

“Are you going to make me wait?” Dean asks when Sam doesn’t move.

Sam takes a shuddering breath before bending his arms into a push-up… with Dean nicely seated in his back. And the bare skin of Sam’s back touching the tantalising bare skin of Dean’s leg where his shorts have ridden up. It’s to send a message of course. Or it’s conditioning. Yeah. Like the Pavlov effect. He can almost hear his brother tell him: You want me close? You want to touch me? Well, then, see how _pleasant_ it can be!

Fucking Christ. At least his dick is as far from hard as it can get.

“What the fuck is that?” Dean probes once more. “You call that a push-up? Seems to me like you’re trying to lie down!”

Damn it all to hell. Sam pushes against the ground, his pride clouding everything else. He knows he’s going to regret it later. “Well… if you weren’t so… damn heavy… it wouldn’t be a problem… would it?” he snarls in between pants at his brother as he continues the exercise.

Dean chuckles lightly, petting Sam on the head. It’s supposed to be a comforting gesture, but Sam’s muscles are so strained that it just seems painful more than anything else. “Or maybe you don’t train enough, did you think about that, princess?”

Sam feels his arms shaking, but damn. He isn’t going to stop there. “Don’t call me… princess! Fuck, fuck, _fuck_!” This is _so_ painful. But he’s nearly there. Three more. “I could… totally beat your ass!”

“Yeah, yeah, save your breath.”

God! Dean is such an ass. But hey, two more. He can do that. One. Sam lowers himself to the ground and, just before he can push back up, Dean tells him to stop moving.

Sam holds the position but barely. His muscles are screaming in agony at him. “Gah!” he sobs-cries, wanting to exteriorise his suffering. “Fuck you! Jesus fucking Christ… you’re… such an asshole! You… fucking jerk!”

And of course it makes Dean laugh. The traitor. However, once Sam’s arms start to visibly tremble, the eldest quickly stands up.

“Oh, thank God!” Sam exclaims before falling to the ground, panting heavily. He’s beyond tired, but he still forces himself to turn around so that he’s lying on his back.

Dean has this cocky expression on his face when he looks at his little brother, though there’s also _some_ sympathy. He sits down next to the teen, letting Sam recuperate. For a few minutes, they just stay there in silence. They don’t need to say words with their mouths to have a conversation however.

 _Sorry_ , Sam eventually communicates by a light brush of his knuckles on his brother’s knee.

 _It’s fine_ , Dean answers by leaning a bit closer and catching Sam’s gaze.

The moment is broken when they hear the backdoor open to the backyard. Sam sits up and grabs his shirt before putting it on while Dean straightens.

Adam appears a second later with a soccer ball in his hands. He has this big grin on his face until he sees his half-brothers. Then, he looks uncertain. He stands on the grass, completely frozen in place.

They’re stuck in an awkward staring contest when Kate finally arrives a few seconds later. Her smile stiffens a bit once she sees Sam and Dean but she still tries to appear pleasant towards her lover’s sons.

“Ah, there you were! I thought you were still sleeping. You did have a lot of excitement in the last few days,” she says nicely if a bit exuberantly as she rambles on. “You missed breakfast, but I made sure to keep some for you. A nice omelet. It’s in the fridge, you just have to heat it up a bit. Unless you want to wait? We were all going to play soccer for a while. You can join if you want.”

Dean’s back is rigid at the suggestion and Sam feels awkward. Soccer? Really?

Kate’s smile slides off her face a bit in front of the stony silence she receives. Then, John appears from the backdoor. He seems positively comfortable in the tense atmosphere and Adam perks up at the presence of the man.

“Dad!” the boy says as he runs to his father.

John chuckles lightly as he briefly hugs Adam and Kate takes a deep breath, seeming to calm herself. “Hey, kid. Ready to play?”

Adam raises the ball over his head and shouts this ridiculous war cry that apparently John and Kate find endearing when it’s actually just plain annoying. Adam starts running all around the place, taunting his father.

“Come on, dad! I’m going to show you how it’s done and I’m totally going to win!”

Sam shoots a look towards Dean. He isn’t the only one to think the display completely ridiculous. When they were this young, they never acted that way. Not that they would have been allowed to, what with demons, ghosts and every sort of creatures they had to fight. No time to play when you have to survive, John used to say.

But now, John just smiles and laughs as he runs to Adam and starts playing soccer with the boy.

Sam is pretty sure he hates John then and it destabilizes him. It’s like his heart burns, making his blood work overtime and his head swell, getting lighter and lighter. His vision narrows down and he can only focus on every movement his father makes. He wants to shout and ask John what the heck he’s playing at. The back of his throat is hurting with the need to voice his thoughts.

Dean grips Sam’s arm hard, making the teen jump. Like he’s brought back to the present, he turns away from John and Adam. He briefly sees Kate with this odd expression on her face, but otherwise, he ignores her.

Instead, he concentrates on Dean. His brother is as upset as he is. Sam sees the pain in his eyes. His rage also. But, mostly, he sees that Dean needs to get the hell out of here and that he doesn’t want to be alone.

Silently, Sam stands up, his muscles still shaking from all the exercises, with Dean right beside him. They walk to the house but before they can enter, Kate calls out to them.

“Sam, Dean… don’t you want to play with us?” she says, sounding like she knows the answer to that question, but unable to stop herself from asking.

Dean snaps. “No.”

Sam wants to be as rude. This has to be one of the worst morning of his entire life, emotionally. But there’s this part of his mind that approaches the whole issue as if he were on a mission. And on a mission, you don’t antagonise the victims or the witnesses because they can always be useful later. So he turns absently with a small smile. “We’re going to take showers and eat breakfast. Maybe later.”

Kate nods, hearing the lie but letting it slip. Sam and Dean go inside the house. They don’t say anything else as they instinctively head to their room, the only place that is ‘theirs’. Dean briefly pauses, looking a bit off, before taking some clean clothes from his bag, like nothing is wrong.

He’s about to leave the room to go to the bathroom but Sam stops him with a hand on Dean’s arm. He doesn’t even think. It’s automatic. Sam brings Dean in a crushing hug. It barely lasts a few seconds though since he realises that he totally just kissed Dean on the neck.

 _What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the_ fuck _are you doing?!_

Sam is confused. Dean is confused. They both look at the other, silently asking what’s going on, but of course they don’t have an answer.

“I… uh… I’m sorry,” Sam eventually stammers.

Dean briefly rubs his face with his free hand before looking at his brother. “Do we have to talk about this? I thought we cleared things up earlier.”

Sam feels dread fill him along with other emotions. Like white-hot shame. And lust. And something else best not described. “No! It’s fine.”

Dean looks sceptically at his little brother. Clearly, it’s not fine, but he sure doesn’t want to talk about it either. And he knows that Sam is smart and that he knows what’s right and wrong. And Sam won’t let this blow out of proportion. Right? “Good. ‘Cause…” Dean doesn’t know what to add to that. He knows that he _should_ just say two, three things to make Sam back down, but…

Fucking hell, this has been one terrible day so far and his head is all messed up and he doesn’t know what he _really_ wants.

Meanwhile, Sam waits, feeling like shit. His face is white and there’s this crease between his eyebrows that shows that he isn’t comfortable. Like he wants to disappear.

Dean sighs, tired. It’s not even ten o’clock in the morning and he’s tired. He rubs his face once again, wanting to disappear too. “You know what? I don’t know. I don’t fucking know, but I’m going to take a shower and I’m going to eat and then I’m getting the hell out of here for the rest of the day. If you want to come with, hurry the hell up.”

Sam hurries the hell up.


	5. Freaking Homework

The week that follows sets a new routine for the Winchesters. John seems nicely settled. He sleeps with Kate, helps her making breakfast and preparing Adam in the morning when the boy has to leave for school and he’s slowly trying to find a job.

Meanwhile, Dean started working. Nothing he’s unused to and it’s actually refreshing. Reassuring even. The same goes for Sam once he starts school again. And in between, the boys find ways to escape the house.

Every single day, they start by training outside. Once done, they just have enough time for food and a shower before they have to leave, each parting their own way. Hours later, they roam around the city (on foot, sadly, no Impala for them) and they come back home just before supper. That’s the part they like less. Sam knows that they can’t just _completely_ disappear. So they stay and eat supper like they’re a perfect little family.

After that, Sam sits in the dinning room with his homework all around him. Dean sits beside him and talks about random shit, which distracts Sam of course. But it doesn’t matter because as annoying as it is to suffer Adam, Kate and John in this terrible scenario, this is when they keep their eyes open and their ears peeled.

They watch as their dad washes the dishes and as Kate helps Adam with his homework in the living room. They observe as John eventually joins the little family and as he tries to help when Adam gets fussy and annoying. They listen in once Adam is off to bed and Kate and John talk.

They gather that Kate is more observant than they gave her credit for, that their half-brother tries his absolute best to snatch their dad’s attention and that John is sure everything is going to be balance out with some time.

The new routine is disturbed however on the second week. Kate has a different shift than usual, which means that she isn’t there to make supper or to help Adam with his homework.

"I don’t understand!" Adam whines as he flops on the sofa, spreading his limbs everywhere. There might even be some frustrated foot-kicking going on there.

Sam grinds his teeth together as he hunches over his homework in the dinning room, holding whatever mean comment inside. He hears Dean sighing beside him in aggravation. This evening is pure torture.

John is in the kitchen, cursing under his breath every five seconds while the food he's trying to make burns, if they are to believe their nose. "What is it you don't understand?" He asks loudly though a bit distractedly.

"This stupid math problem!" Adam answers between pitiful grunts.

Sam rolls his eyes at the boy's antics. He remembers when he was this young and had trouble understanding his homework. He couldn't ask Dean for help since he barely understood his classes himself and there was no way John was going to be there to help. So what did he do? He opened a fucking book and started reading. Answers are so easily acquired.

"You... what?" John yells, sounding completely overwhelmed. "Adam, I can't hear you when you try to talk to me from so far away! If you want to ask something, come over here!"

Adam grumbles a bit but gathers his notebook and pencil before slowly making his way to the cacophonous kitchen. Both Sam and Dean breathe a bit easier when the little boy disappears.

"Holy Christ! Can that kid be noisy when he wants," Dean exclaims as he pushes his chair back on two legs.

"Yeah..." Sam agrees quietly. He concentrates on his homework after that.

Or he tries to, anyway. He has noticed that Dean watches him more recently. Since the 'accident'. Some part of him finds the situation terribly embarrassing. It shouldn't have happened, it was wrong and... yeah. He wants to brush the whole thing aside. It would be even better if Dean could just forget everything too.

But there's this other part of Sam that kind of... likes the attention. Which is awful of him, he knows. However, how can he hate the looks he gets when Dean's eyes aren't full of resentment?

It's the strangest thing. Sam knows that their relationship probably isn't completely healthy. They're both perfectly fine with it. He knows that they're maybe a tad too close to each other, but there were limits and they respected them.

Until he blew everything away, of course. He knew that the limits were there for a reason and he never _was_ going to do anything to compromise them because that's just stupid. After all, how could he possibly get closer to his own brother? By marrying him? Ha! Ha...

Oh God... He'd be totally okay with that. He's sick. Fuck. And Dean has to be sick a bit too because he's not supposed to look at Sam like that after the 'accident'. With this sort of... of puzzlement... and cautious, morbid curiosity.

It makes Sam's blood boil. In a good way. Or maybe not. He doesn't know.

"Fuck!" They both hear John yell from the kitchen.

Sam and Dean both jump to attention, used to this tone of voice in their father. The tone that has an edge of anger and urgency. The tone John normally uses just before he orders the boys around.

It's habit that pushes the brothers out of the dinning room and into the kitchen. Their eyes roam around the place, checking for the source of the problem, any weapons available and all the escape routes.

They quickly come to the conclusion that John has just burnt himself with a pan full of charred grilled cheese sandwiches while trying to help Adam with his math problem. The man now has his hands under some water in the sink with Adam standing a few feet away from John, looking unsure.

Sam and Dean are about to leave the room after this false alarm when their father finally sees them. There's a look that crosses John's face. One of complete relief.

"Sam! Just... Help Adam. He's having some trouble with his homework and I'm a bit busy right now."

Sam gapes at this before quickly glancing at Adam. The boy doesn’t seem overly happy about this either. “But… I kind of have my own homework to do…” he tries to explain.

Because, hey, if John _wanted_ to have Adam, then the boy is his fucking problem, right?

John doesn’t seem to be of the same opinion by the glare he sends to the teenager. “Now, Sam,” he says harshly before turning back to the sink, clearly dismissing them all.

Sam and Dean both sigh before exiting the kitchen, a sullen Adam right behind them. They all sit at the table in the dinning room and then just stare. Sam and Dean at Adam, Adam at Sam and Dean.

“Get it over with,” Dean mumbles at his brother before taking a pen and paper. He starts doodling.

Sam sighs. Why, why, why? Why do these type of things have to fall on him? “What is it you’re having some trouble with?” he finally asks the young boy.

Adam almost throws the book at Sam, which just gets on the teenager’s nerves. But Sam doesn’t say anything. He just calmly takes the exercise book and looks at the math problems. He sees that it’s about adding fractions. And there’s a very clear example at the top of the page.

“So… additions. Can’t be that hard.” Sam can’t help but poke Adam. The boy shouldn’t have pitched that much of a fit for these tiny math problems. It clearly was to get some attention from their dad.

Adam makes a face. “So you say. Why don’t you show me?”

Dean snorts quietly beside him and Sam can barely believe what he just heard. Has Adam just challenged him? Over a stupid math problem? “I’m not doing your homework for you,” he sneers. “Look, you have an example on the exercise and I think it shows you everything you need to know. So how about you stop acting like an idiot and do the fucking problem?”

Adam seems to be taken aback at that. But, hell, this is the first time Sam and Adam are talking. Adam thought he could act like a little shit and get away with it. Clearly, he hasn’t ever tried to take on a Winchester. Not counting John of course…

“You can’t talk to me like that!” Adam complains loudly.

Thankfully, John is making so much noise in the kitchen that he can’t hear the brat.

Sam shrugs his shoulders at the boy. “I honestly don’t really care. Now do your homework,” he orders before finally leaning over his own school work, giving it all his attention.

But Adam wasn’t done. He’s fuming. “I’ll tell my mom!” he says nastily.

It makes Dean laugh, which startles the boy. “Yeah, do that. Nothing she can do about it,” he promises the boy.

Adam glares at both of his half-brothers as he takes his book back. He stands. “I hate you!” he yells before leaving the dinning room.

Sam rolls his eyes while Dean laughs. At least Adam does work after that until the supper is ready, which means no more whining. Small mercies.


	6. The Last Drop

Sam has only ever wanted to be normal. Really. Some part of him hates that he’s so tall (even taller than Dean now) and that he’s… too fit for his age. He hates that he knows fifty ways to kill monsters. And about two hundred ways to kill a human. By default, of course. He hates that he’s set apart from everyone his age even if he tries his best to fit in.

Or, well, he used to feel that way. He realises that he’s stuck in a situation that’s making him… slowly change his mind. He’s not sure what’s wrong exactly. He never had problem with school before. It was his safe haven. That’s where he didn’t have to worry about moving yet again, where he could just burry himself in his studies and where he could have conversations that were _normal_.

But now… is it just him or are the other teens his age… really insipid? They keep talking about who hooked up with whom, who was a bitch and their freaking weekends. The same subjects, no matter where he goes and he just can’t stand it anymore. He never thought he would think it, but he’s suddenly glad that he doesn’t fit the norm.

Because it means that he’s not a sheep, that he can think for himself and that he doesn’t feel pressured into being like everybody else. Or something like that. He’s not too sure yet.

So, for the first time, he doesn’t really even try to talk with any of the other students. Oh, he’s polite and when the teacher asks them to pair up, he doesn’t have any problem with it. He knows to be nice and he always helps his partner because he wants the work to be done as fast as possible.

He must come out as a snob that knows everything. But he honestly doesn’t care.

Sam pushes open the door to the locker room with a sigh. If there is one class that seems to be the most useless, it’s gym class. He just hates it. It sure is useless to him.

He drops his bag on a bench while the locker room fills with the other guys from his class. He pulls out his gym clothes, noting, as always, that they’re so much more worn than the clothes from the other students. He cares less today than he usually does though.

Sam takes off his shirt and jeans and, seeing movement to his left, he quickly looks from the corner of his eye. It’s only Brandon, showing off his biceps to his friends. Or is it Jordan? He can’t really recall the name, but the guy is an idiot. Sam curses his stupid reflexes and his fucking need to always be on alert. What the heck could happen here, anyway? It’s not like there’s a ghost or any other type of creature here. He’s a hundred percent sure Dean checked and he would have told Sam if there was anything suspicious.

So he forces himself to take a breath and just concentrate on his own things. He has one leg up, to put on his shorts, when someone pushes him. The movement is so sudden that he falls, first on the bench and then on the floor, where he knocks his head. Dazed, he quickly scrambles up, ready for the next punch if there’ll be one.

He looks up, only to see that it’s Brandon/Jordan that pushed him if he goes by the smug smirk that bastard is sporting. The locker room is silent.

“Uh… Jordan, what the heck, man?” eventually asks a student, Alex if Sam remembers correctly. He’s a nice guy, if maybe a bit too righteous.

Jordan doesn’t back down. Not that he really can when he has such a big audience. Sam is sure he gets off on it. “He was looking at my junk!” Jordan says loudly.

Sam rolls his eyes when the rest of the guys immediately look at Sam, worry clear on their faces. He decides to ignore them because there’s no way he’s going to enter this kind of game. It’ll only look like he’s trying to defend himself anyway.

So he bends down to pick up his shorts, ignoring the throb on the back of his head. He’s about to pull the garment on, maybe even for good this time, when Jordan opens his mouth once more.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought, fag.”

And Sam sees how the guy is smiling, like he’s so much better than anyone else. Better than him and… and, God, Sam can’t stand this anymore. He snaps.

He doesn’t really notice that he’s dropped his shorts on the ground or that his fist goes flying. He realises only once he feels the impact between his fist and Jordan’s jaw. Thankfully not hard enough that it dislodges the bone, but enough that the guy slams back in the lockers and then on the floor. Jordan suddenly looks frightened and the other guys all take a step back, shocked into silence. Sam thinks he hears the door opening, but he’s not sure. All of his focus is on the bastard in front of him that groans in pain.

Sam crouches on the floor to be eye-level with Jordan. He lets his silence speak for a moment, making the guy in front of him lose all of his confidence. It feels good. A bit. Sam wouldn’t do it every day, he’s not a bully, but for now, it feels great. He realises that he’s overreacting, of course. Being insulted isn’t enough to push Sam so far. It’s just that with everything that’s going on with Kate and Adam and his dad… This was the last drop. His patience has run thin.

“You know I didn’t look at your junk and if I really did want to see anyone’s junk, it sure as hell wouldn’t be yours, fat ass,” Sam says viciously. Because, seriously, the guy still has baby fat around his face and stomach which is a big turn off. “So don’t fuck with me, especially if it’s to hide the fact that _you’re_ deep in the closet, am I clear?”

Jordan, of course, seems humiliated, mostly angry and only a bit scared at this point. In other words: like he didn’t get the message at all. Probably because of the last comment. Didn’t want his friends to know that he’d rather suck cock than fuck a pussy. Though how he’s hoping to hide that fact while he tries to show off his biceps, Sam has no fucking clue.

Sam is wondering if he should just punch the guy a second time. Honestly, what would it change at this point? But, well, it’s not ethical and he isn’t that mean. Dean would go for it, he’s sure. He’d do it and he wouldn’t regret it later on. Sam, on the other hand, knows that he’s going to feel bad eventually when he calms down.

He doesn’t have the time to find what he’s going to do to make sure that Jordan will leave him alone in the future however. He’s still crouched down when the door bangs open. Sam turns his head to see the gym teacher, who looks mad as hell, and Alex right behind him.

“What is going on here?!” the teacher, a bear of a man, asks loudly.

Of course, Jordan is the first to answer. “He punched me!” he says while pointing Sam.

Sam rolls his eyes, wishing for this day to end. He can’t wait to see Dean and walk around town and just forget, forget, forget. Forget this crazy life that should be normal but is just plain weird and agonizing.

The teacher looks at the teen’s face, which is quickly swelling, and doesn’t ask any question, probably wishing for his day to end too. He just glares at Sam. “Already making trouble, Winchester? Go to the principal’s office.”

Sam raises an eyebrow. He the fuck is that fair? “Well he pushed me,” he says slowly.

The teacher seems like he’s really close to just give up at that. He has to count the days before his retirement. Has to. “Fine. Brown, you too. The rest of you boys better get your asses in class in two minutes, got me?”

Jordan splutters while the rest of the guys jump into action. Sam simply goes back to his bag, putting his normal clothes back on. He’s pretty sure he isn’t going to come back here.

He leaves the locker room, bag in had, but not before he gives one last look at Jordan. The teen is staring at Sam with retribution clear in his eyes. Sam discreetly groans.

He really overreacted. Damn it. This is going to be such a hassle.


	7. The Fallout

This isn’t the first time Sam has been in the principal’s office. Far from it. But it _is_ the first time that he finds himself there because he has done something ‘bad’.

Talking with the principal doesn’t take long. In fact, the man just looks at Jordan’s swollen cheek and Sam sees that he’s made his mind right there. Sam tries to defend himself some, not wanting to get dragged into any of this bullshit, but it clearly doesn’t work. It barely takes ten minutes before the principal decides to call the student’s parents and to suspend Sam for a week. Which sucks big time.

Jordan’s father comes to the school, dressed in a plain suit and wearing a mean expression on his face. He glares at Sam and quickly lashes out at the principal. Then, he grabs his son and flies out of the room before anyone can get a word in.

The principal looks like he’s about to either explode or weep. Sam wisely stays seated on his seat, barely daring to breathe. The man looks out the window longingly. They can see the trees’ branches from this angle and it seems to have a calming effect on the principal.

Only then does the older man look back at Sam.

“I called your father,” he says, as if the teen didn’t know. But Sam is sure the principal is still trying to gain back his composure, so he doesn’t point it out. “He should be here any minute.”

Again, Sam stays still, not voicing what he truly thinks.

No way is his dad coming to get him.

***

The bell rings loudly throughout the school, announcing the start of the day’s last class. Sam watches as the principal looks at the clock on the wall with a concerned frown on his face.

The man had let Sam fetch his backpack and books forty minutes after Jordan left the office. The teen then sat down at a small desk, too small for him, not far from the principal and started working on his homework.

Every few minutes, he saw the man glancing at the clock, again and again. Time flew, which seemed to frustrate the principal. He tried to call Sam’s father once more after two hours. And then again at lunch time. And then every single hour.

“Do you know why your father isn’t answering?” the man finally asks.

Sam shrugs. “Working,” he answers, but he knows that his dad either doesn’t care or is trying to teach Sam a lesson in his own fucked up way.

The principal nods, not completely convinced. And so they stay silent, the man working while Sam reads a book for a class.

***

There’s a knock on the door just as school lets up and Sam quickly gathers his stuff, knowing whoever is on the other side is here for him. When the door opens, Sam isn’t surprised to find his brother entering the office.

“Oh,” the principal sighs in relief. “You’re Sam Winchester’s brother, if I remember correctly?”

Dean smiles, acting as friendly as possible. “Yeah. Sorry for the wait; couldn’t leave work.”

Sam puts all of his books into his backpack before standing. He’s more than ready to leave school. The principal, however, isn’t ready to let them go.

“I’m sorry, but I called your father, is there any reason he couldn’t come here himself?” the man asks, sounding both polite and irritated at the same time. “I hoped to discuss what happened today with him.”

Sam cringes slightly at that revelation. Not that he should have expected anything else, honestly. But just the thought of his dad sitting there with the principal, or him taking this seriously, is ridiculous.

Dean doesn’t let his true thoughts on the matter show in the slightest, the grin still bright on his face with a touch of apology thrown in there just to look sincere. “He’s really sorry he couldn’t come. You see, he’s a nurse and there was an emergency at the hospital.”

The principal nods grudgingly, the frustration and concern finally draining away. Sam, meanwhile, has to stop himself from spluttering. Because, his dad? A nurse? He’s used to lies, but this has to be the most hilarious one he’s heard so far. Sure, John has saved the lives of many people, but never because he wanted to. No, no. It only happened because it was part of his quest for revenge.

“All right then,” the principal says, drawing Sam back to the present. “Nothing we can do about this. I’ll see how we can arrange a meeting at another time. For now, Sam is suspended for a week.”

Dean nods and opens the door which prompts Sam to move. They quickly call their goodbyes before finally leaving the office. It’s only once they’re out of the building that Dean smacks his brother on the back of the head.

“What the heck?” Dean asks, his anger showing through. San can see that Dean is really worried though.

The teen shrugs, uneasy. Some part of him feels a bit guilty. “I just… I overreacted,” he mumbles.

Dean sighs, tugging at his hair in frustration. He looks like there’s a heavy weight on his shoulders and Sam is pretty sure that it’s his fault. Or that part of it is. Dean is the one that raised him, but he never had to talk to Sam about unnecessary violence.

“Yeah, no kidding!” Dean hisses without any real bite as he lets go of his hair.

Sam glances quickly at his brother, still feeling bad about the situation. Not about hitting Jordan, because, honestly, the guy asked for it. But about losing control when it seems so important at the moment.

“Did dad call you?” he eventually asks as they leave the school grounds behind them.

Dean nods, keeping his eyes firmly on the road ahead of them. “Yeah… I came as soon as he did.”

Sam hums, hearing in his brother’s tone that that hadn’t been a fun phone call. “And?”

“He’s pissed, Sammy,” Dean says neutrally.

But Sam knows him and he knows that Dean is trying to hide how angry he really is. So Sam scoffs. Like his dad has the right to actually be pissed about anything. “Fuck him,” he mutters, his voice full of feelings.

Dean turns towards his little brother, clearly to tell him off, but after a few seconds of his mouth opening and closing uselessly, he faces the road again, resigned.

Sam sees that Dean feels overwhelmed and he reaches out to the man, taking Dean’s hand in his. Sam watches as his brother’s jaw tightens, as his breath hitches slightly and as his posture straightens. But Dean doesn’t let go. So Sam interlaces their fingers, making the gesture so much more intimate. Dean gradually relaxes into the hold, which has to mean something. They _are_ holding hands in a very public area at rush hour. But he’s not sure what it means exactly, not yet.

“Okay,” Dean eventually says and Sam doesn’t know what Dean is agreeing to, which just confuses him more. But he doesn’t ask any question, afraid to break this good mood they have.

***

When Sam opens the door to the Milligan’s house, he’s not holding Dean’s hand anymore and it’s a good thing because John immediately jumps on him.

“What happened?” John asks him, looking furious as Dean quietly closes the door behind him.

Sam gently drops his backpack on the floor. He doesn’t know how he should feel. Guilty, fearful, sad? Probably. He shouldn’t feel this numb he thinks. Or this slowly simmering anger. “I punched a guy,” he says, maybe trying to push his father’s buttons.

John has this expression on his face, like he just doesn’t know what to do and like Sam is a huge fucking disappointment. Or inconvenience. “The fuck, Sam? I didn’t teach you to beat school kids! I taught you to protect yourself!”

Sam isn’t sure why he bothers to try and explain. Maybe it’s a last-ditch effort. “Who said I wasn’t protecting myself?” he asks aggressively, his anger quickly winning over his numbness.

John looks at his son in disbelief. “From what? Dean wouldn’t have let you go to a school if there was anything supernatural going on there.”

And isn’t that just the fucking problem? Sam throws a quick look at his brother. Dean is standing stiffly by the door, glaring at the wall. Probably also angry about how unfair their dad is being. Christ. And John is wondering why one of his sons lost it and punched a guy.

“What?” Sam asks defiantly as he turns back to look at his father. “So I should let other kids laugh about my sexual orientation?”

Suddenly, everything is silent. Sam knows he’s still pushing his dad. He wants to see if John is going to man up at some point. Maybe realise that Sam and Dean need a dad, someone they can go to if they have a problem, someone that is going to love them no matter what.

But it’s clearly a lost cause by the way John looks like he wants to disappear and Sam doesn’t know why he even tried.

“Go to your room,” John eventually says, a pinched look on his face. There isn’t any disgust in the expression. Sam realises that his dad just doesn’t want to deal his two eldest sons and any problem they might have just makes them more annoying. “I don’t want to see your face until supper.”

Sam is shocked despite everything. And it’s only because Dean tugs at his arm that he moves to their room, grateful that his brother has his back.

“Dean,” John warns, the reprimand clear in his voice. It’s easy for the brothers to understand that their dad doesn’t want them to be together right now.

But Dean doesn’t even turn around. “Shut up,” he says clearly.

John keeps his mouth shut, probably shocked that the perfect son finally talked back, and the brothers step into their room.


	8. Family Meeting

When he hears a knock on their door, Dean is very tempted to act like a kid and not answer. The last two hours have been fine, he guesses. The brothers talked about random stuff, trying to distract themselves from what happened.

Dean doesn’t ask Sam any question. Partly because he doesn’t feel the need to talk about their emotions since, obviously, they’re feeling the same things and they both are _so_ close to just exploding. Partly, also, because he doesn’t think there’s anything left to say.

They’re on their own. They truly are this time.

And there’s also this thing about Sam’s sexuality that Dean isn’t even going to poke with a stick because he’s pretty sure he can’t deal with this. Not in the _right_ way. Like being-supportive-and-assure-Sam-it’s-fine kind of way. Well, no… Actually, he’s sure he can do that, but more in a it’s-fine-Sammy-I-love-you-anyway-now-how-about-we-see-just-how-much-you-like-cock kind of way.

So. No poking the subject in his mind. Much.

Instead, Dean has tried to think about what they should do. Stay? Leave? Call Bobby? He’s not sure and he wants to think on it some more before sharing his thoughts with Sam.

“Dean? Sam?” Kate’s muffled voice asks through the door. “Supper is ready.”

Dean hears his brother sigh in aggravation as he shoves the gun he was cleaning in his duffle bag, under his clothes.

Sam opens the door, revealing a smiling Kate. Dean almost wants to throw a knife in her stupid face. Almost. No one can truly be this positive and happy about having their home invaded by weird sullen young adults.

“Hey, guys,” Kate says quietly, not moving one bit. “I didn’t know you were here until your father told me you were… in your room…” she trails off, finally noticing that the air is heavier than normal. “Are you okay? Is something wrong? Is it about your room? You know, I keep forgetting about the extra mattress, I’m so sorry! You’re probably tired of having to sleep in the same bed, especially at your age. In fact, I should just convert my office. I understand wanting to have some privacy, especially if you’re going to bring a girl over-”

Dean is getting a headache just listening to that woman. First, because she talks a lot and very fast at that. Second, because she can’t possibly mean what he thinks she means.

“You’d let us have sex in your house?” he asks disbelievingly. He slept around a lot and if there’s one thing he’s learned, it’s that parents never want their kids (or step-kids) to have sex under their roof.

That shuts her up. “Oh… uh… what? Uh, no! I mean… preferably… not?”

Kate honestly looks like she’s very uncomfortable and Dean doesn’t even know what to say.

“He’s messing with you,” Sam eventually tells her when the silence becomes too awkward. “We’re not going to bring any girl over, so no worries. And you don’t have to change your office into a bedroom, it’s fine.”

And with that, Sam and Dean walk out of their room, heading towards the dining room with Kate not far behind. John and Adam are already seated at the table, waiting for them all.

The brothers sit in their usual seats, one beside the other. Dean glances at their father, only to see that John is ignoring his two eldest sons quite spectacularly. The tension, which was tangible in their room is now so heavy it’s suffocating. Unless you’re a Winchester and used to the treatment, of course.

Kate sits down warily and everyone tucks into their plates silently. Even Adam is unusually quiet, glaring from time to time at his half-brothers, as if he blames them for the unpleasant evening. When Kate seems to understand that no one is going to say anything, she clears her throat.

“Okay, so… what happened?”

Dean shrugs his shoulders and Sam just keeps his eyes on his plate. They don’t want to talk about anything with her. But John isn’t of the same opinion.

“I got a call from Sam’s school today,” the man says, his jaw tight. Kate looks worried. “Apparently, Sam punched another kid at school and now he’s suspended for a week.”

Kate stares at Sam who still has his eyes on his plate. Dean feels his teeth grind together. Discreetly, he reaches over and lets his hand rest Sam’s knee. If he could, he thinks he’d just snatch the teen and hide him were no one is ever going to find him.

“Oh,” Kate breathes slowly. Seconds tick by and the tension seems to worsen with John steadily glaring at Sam. “Why did you do it?” she eventually asks the teen.

Dean has to stop himself from choking on his own spit; he’s so surprised. Since they’ve been kids, _kids_ , everyone has always assumed the reason behind their actions. To be fair, their dad and Bobby kind of knew them enough to come to the right conclusions, but still…

Sam has this look on his face, like he’s stunned. “Uh… well, I was in the locker room at school…” he starts, full of hesitation.

But Kate nods in encouragement, stopping Sam from second-guessing himself too much. “And, um, this guy pushed me. I cracked my head on the floor-”

“You _what?!_ ” John asks almost savagely, sounding like he might be worried to Kate and Adam, but Dean knows it’s really because the man can’t believe Sam let his guard down enough to get hurt.

Sam hunches down a bit in his chair, like he’s slightly ashamed. Dean wants to growl.

“Oh, God. Are you okay, sweetie? Need me to take a look?” Kate asks, horror clear on her face.

Dean cringes at the nickname while the teen flinches at it. “No, no, it’s nothing… I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?” she prods and her stance suggests that she’s about to stand up and go check anyway.

Sam is quick to stop her by changing the subject. “Yeah, I am. Anyway, I got up and then the guy insulted me-”

“Sam,” John grits out, clearly wanting his son to keep some details to himself.

The teen scowls. “And then I snapped.”

Silence falls back in the dinning room, with John still glaring at his sons and Kate looking uncertain. Adam scarfs down his food before quickly leaving the dinning room, not taking his plate back to the kitchen. Kate doesn’t even seem to notice, too focused on the brothers.

“Well…” the woman starts slowly then stops, looking at John for some support. Their dad doesn’t budge from his position however, his arms now crossed and his eyes sending daggers at Sam. Kate turns back to the teen, seeming uneasy in this situation. “Uh… Sam… I understand that high school isn’t easy and that the other boy started it, but… you can’t just hit someone. This isn’t how you solve disagreements. Can you imagine doing this later in life? You’re not just going to get suspended, you could eventually get arrested!”

Dean fidgets at the awkward speech, wanting this to end. How is this their life? Stuck in a permanent home where John lets this woman act like a parent figure when she’s just a stranger to them.

Sam seems to have the same thought process because he gets this twisted expression on his face between bewilderment and exasperation. “Yeah, I know… I just… snapped. It won’t happen again.”

Kate studies Sam for a short while, but she clearly isn’t convinced by the teen. She turns towards her lover a second time. “Aren’t you going to say something?”

John stays frozen a beat too long before uncrossing his arms. Then, he ignores Sam to look at Kate. “The principal called an hour ago. He wants to see Sam and I, so we scheduled a meeting next Monday at two o’clock. Unfortunately, I can’t skip work right now, so I need you to go in my stead.”

The reaction to this is instantaneous. Kate’s face turns white while Sam’s shoulders drop and Dean startles badly.

“I can go,” Dean says brusquely and everyone’s attention falls on him. “It’s not like it would be the first time I met Sam’s principal and I know Sam better than _her_.” Dean knows he’s not really being respectful towards Kate, but what the fuck does he _care_ at this point?

Of course, John doesn’t let this go. “Hey! Change your tone!” he orders his eldest like Dean is a little kid.

Dean scowls. “Yes, sir,” he says derisively because he can’t even pretend to be the perfect soldier son anymore. He stands up before looking at Sam. “I’m going out for a walk.”

Sam jumps up from his seat, only too glad to follow his big brother. They leave their plates where they are, still half-full with food.

“You’re just going to leave your plates there? You’re not in a fucking castle-” John starts angrily before Kate puts a hand on the man’s arm, effectively shutting him up.

Then she turns to face the brothers with a tight, fake smile on her face. “Oh, just leave them here, it’s fine, I’ll take care of them. You take your walk to breathe a bit, alright?”

Suddenly, Dean doesn’t hate the woman so much. He doesn’t like her, probably never will because she stole their dad from them, but she is sensible and he can appreciate that. So he nods at her before taking hold of Sam’s arm and quickly leaving the dining room.

They only have the time to hear Kate ask John “what was that?!” as they put their shoes on and then they’re out of the house.


	9. Babysitting

“Uh… what?” Dean asks slowly as he looks at his dad. He can’t have heard right. It’s just… not possible.

But John has this look on his face, like he’s partly annoyed at Dean and partly resigned. “I said that I need you to look after Adam this weekend because Kate and I are going… away.”

Dean throws a glance at the woman behind his dad for confirmation. Kate seems slightly unhappy still from last night’s argument but she also seems determined. Wherever the couple is going, it isn’t for a romantic getaway. Trouble in paradise?

“Okay…” Dean drags the word. “Is there… something special going on that I don’t know about? For Adam, I mean.” Because that’s the only thing that would make some sense at this point. Seriously, why else would Adam need someone to look after him? Dean has been left alone with Sam since he was eight. Surely, at ten, the boy can take care of himself?

John doesn’t answer the question, like he doesn’t really know what to say to this. Kate jumps in. “No, nothing special. You just need to make sure he eats properly and that he goes to bed at nine. There’s also this school project he’s been procrastinating on, so he _really_ needs to finish that. Also, no more than three hours of television per day, and don’t let him trick you into watching some more!”

Dean is sure for a second that Kate is kidding. He waits for her to tell him so, but she just looks at him, waiting for him to say something. That’s when he realises that, no, she’s dead serious. At that realisation, Dean almost gapes at her.

Adam _needs_ someone to tell him to go to sleep? To stop watching TV? Dean tries to remember how Sam was at that age and… damn. Sure, Sam could bitch sometimes; he still does. But homework hasn’t ever been a problem. When he saw that it was time to go to bed, he went without at word. He didn’t need Dean to feed him either, though Dean likes to do it because… it’s Sam.

But Adam? He’s a whiny, annoying kid that doesn’t fully appreciate what he has. Dean doesn’t like him, barely tolerates him, and now he has to make sure that the baby is carefully pampered? Kill. Him. Now.

But then he remembers how Kate diluted the situation last night. She even let them escape John’s wrath. So… they kind of owe her, which Dean hates. He doesn’t want to owe anything to anybody, especially if it’s for something that he could have handled. Like an angry father.

Yeah. He can give her this favor if it means that they don’t owe her anything afterwards. It won’t be fun and it will be a very long, painful weekend, but it isn’t too much to ask.

“Fine,” he says.

***

Dean regrets agreeing to babysit Adam. Oh, does he regret it.

Early the next morning, it isn’t bad in any way at first. He wakes up with Sam almost completely sprawled on him, which, fuck, he finds more and more tempting with every passing day. He tries not to think too much about what’s going on, but it’s almost impossible to do so when he’s barely awake.

So he has, like… energy… to spend. Somehow. And he usually does so with training in the morning. Sam follows him and everything is going just fine. Sure, Sam’s eyes wonder and, fine, his do too. But it’s easy to ignore, like every fucking day.

But then, things sour quickly when Adam appears in the backyard and asks to have breakfast. Sam gets this annoyed expression on his face. Dean is pretty sure that he looks just the same. Hasn’t the kid heard about cereals?

This is a favor that he’s doing so that they don’t owe anything to Kate anymore he has to remind himself. So Dean sighs in aggravation when Adam asks for some eggs and bacon, but he complies to the brat’s wishes. He shares a quick glance with Sam though, expressing his frustration.

“Go shower,” he tells the teen with regret at their interrupted training. Sam reluctantly stands up from the ground, where he was previously doing some push-ups, and walks up to the house, his feet dragging in disappointment.

Dean sighs once more before heading inside also, Adam right behind him. They both walk to the kitchen. There, Dean takes out some eggs, bacon and butter from the fridge and a pan from a cupboard. Without thinking too much, he throws the bacon on the pan.

“That’s not how you’re supposed to cook the bacon!” Adam suddenly exclaims, almost in alarm. “You’re supposed to put it in the oven so that it’s crispy all over! Just like mom does it!”

Dean stares at Adam for a while, feeling kind of pissed off. “Do I look like your mom?” he can’t help himself but ask sarcastically.

Adam gets this very confused expression as he looks more closely at Dean’s face. After a minute or two he finally answers the question. “No?” he ventures.

Dean nods before turning back to face the oven, rolling his eyes. “That’s right, because I’m _not_ your mom and I _don’t_ do everything like she does.”

At that, Adam scoffs, insulted. “Whatever,” he mumbles petulantly and then he leaves the room. A few seconds later, Dean hears sound from the TV.

When the food is finally ready, they all sit down in the dinning room. Sam attacks his breakfast with gusto and he sends a grateful smile at his older brother. Adam, on the other hand, has this expression on his face that suggests disgust, though he keeps his comments to himself, which is a smart move in Dean’s opinion.

Okay. So the bacon isn’t extra crispy. So Dean didn’t put any spice in the eggs. So the bread for the toasts might taste a tiny bit stale. But, hell, Dean isn’t a fucking chef. He also never had more than the bare minimum to feed Sam and himself either. What did Adam, Kate and his _dad_ expect from him?

At least the food didn’t come out of a box or a can.

***

Later in the day, Dean enters the living room, finding Adam still slumped on the couch after four hours of watching TV. The boy quickly jumps up once he sees the young man, guilty.

Dean has to breathe carefully to stay calm, hating this ridiculous situation. He knows that Adam knows the rule about TV time. It’s clear as day just by the way the boy can’t look straight into his eyes. So why is Adam always pushing the limits? It’s stupid. Suddenly, Dean sees how _easy_ it was to raise Sam, despite the tantrums and the back-talking. At least Sam was smart to know when he could or couldn’t push.

For a few seconds, Dean stares at Adam, until the boy finally looks at him properly. Then, Dean shakes his head once with a tiny shrug, silently asking Adam what the heck he thinks he’s doing.

Adam gulps, looking even younger than he is. “Uh… I… I didn’t know… um…” he stutters.

Dean doesn’t give him any time to justify himself. It’s just going to be awkward and, honestly, Dean doesn’t have any patience for any bullshit. So he points to the big clock hanging right over the TV. “Seriously?”

Adam hangs his head, clearly embarrassed that he got caught before he could even lie. But Dean doesn’t miss the tiny glint of rebellion in the boy’s eyes and he just can’t let that be. Not if he wants his weekend to be tolerable at the very least.

“Look, kid,” Dean starts, knowing that this is going to be the only speech he’s going to give the boy. If Adam doesn’t understand after that, well it sure won’t be his problem anymore. “This isn’t going to fly with me. You know the rules and they sure haven’t changed just because your mom isn’t there.”

Adam gives Dean a look of pure loathing. It sets Dean’s teeth on edge and he finally loses his patience.

“Oh, you know what? Do what the fuck you want! Watch TV all day long, don’t do your homework. It’s not like I care.” Though Dean cuts his last sentence short, the message is clear. _It’s not like I care about you_. And Adam understands completely how alone he is this time, how daddy isn’t going to pop up and save the day. Maybe that’s why his shin starts wobbling.

“I don’t like you… I want my mom back,” the boy mutters between hiccups.

And Dean… Dean kind of feels like a mean asshole suddenly. Sure, the kid is annoying, but… can Dean really expect him to not act like a child when he was brought up in a carefree environment? And… well… the comment about wanting his mom… Dean can remember when he wanted his own mom there with him.

He sighs and relents, not wanting to actually _break_ the kid. It would just make the situation even worse than it already is. “She’ll be back soon,” he reassures Adam, though it must not be enough because fat tears slide down the boy’s cheek. “I’m sure you can call her,” he suggests.

Adam nods and leaves the living room to go fetch the telephone.

***

The rest of the day passes without any further incident. Adam is calmer after talking with Kate and he keeps to himself, barely even talking to the brothers.

Once the boy goes to bed, at exactly nine o’clock, Dean feels like he can finally breathe. So he heads to his room with the vague idea of crashing down himself. He opens the door, finding Sam already sitting on the bed with a book in his hands. The teen looks up eagerly.

“Did he go to bed?” Sam asks and Dean nods tiredly.

Sam almost throws his book towards his duffle bag before stretching and pulling Dean to the bed. Dean, completely surprised, lets Sam manhandle him until he finds himself with a lapful of teenager. The position, more intimate than they’re both used to when completely awake, makes his heart beat furiously while his hands naturally fall on Sam’s hips.

“Sammy?” he asks, not even able to fool himself anymore: he wants to see where this is going to go despite how wrong it is.

Sam growls at Dean. “You’re _my_ brother,” he exclaims vehemently against Dean’s neck.

All the anticipation and the sexual tension that Dean felt fall completely at that. He snorts at the jealous teen in his arms. “Sorry. Did you need some attention?” he asks teasingly.

Sam leans back to properly look at Dean in the eyes. The hunger he sees there is undeniable and the tension comes back full force, almost tearing a gasp out of Dean.

“You’re _my_ brother,” Sam repeats seriously. “I don’t like it when you pretend to be Adam’s too.”

Dean feels a shudder course through him. Objectively, he can see how they’re way too co-dependent of one another. It’s like they have this tight bubble around the both of them that rejects anyone else that tries to enter it. Subjectively, he finds the possessiveness kind of hot. And, well, it’s not like he doesn’t understand. He hates it when people try to approach Sam.

He rubs his hands soothingly over Sam’s hips, the gesture gentle and borderline sensual. “I don’t like it either. Don’t worry, there’s just you.”

Silence meets that statement with Sam looking slightly surprised. He probably didn’t expect Dean to just let the moment turn this intimate. After all, Dean is the one that said ‘no’ not too long ago. But the air between the two is almost charged with electricity. So, carefully, Sam leans closer to his brother until there’s barely any space left between their faces. They breathe each other’s air for what feels like an eternity when Dean finally lowers his eyes to look at Sam’s lips.

Like it was the cue Sam was waiting for, he leans forward once more, making their lips brush. Sam keeps his eyes slightly opened to see Dean’s reaction, clearly afraid the man is going to push him away. But Dean just sighs in relief, feeling balanced for the first time since they’ve moved in with Kate and Adam. He finally sees what he should stride towards.

Wanting more, Dean rises one hand to the back of Sam’s head, guiding the teen into a proper kiss. Sam practically melts on him, which amuses Dean somewhat. Slowly, he licks his younger brother’s bottom lip, seeking entrance, which he readily gets. The feel of Sam’s tongue on his, of all this warm slickness, is a feeling like none other. Despite himself, Dean gets hard in a matter of second, which, of course, Sam can feel.

Sam backs away eventually, his face completely flushed. Dean briefly glances downward, seeing how much the teen is also affected.

“Good?” he asks smugly.

Sam lightly slaps Dean on the shoulder though there’s still a fond smile on his face and flickers of pure happiness in his eyes. “Jerk.”

“Bitch,” he answers with the biggest grin.

A grin that firmly stays there until they both snuggle together under the covers, trying to fall asleep.


	10. One More Day

Sam slowly wakes up from his slumber, feeling rather warm and content. For a few minutes, however, he doesn’t move, barely even dares to breathe. He simply commits to memory the way Dean is almost completely sprawled over him with his nose pressed against Sam’s neck. The way their legs are tangled together. The way Dean’s fingers twitch slightly on his chest.

Nothing too unusual. But normally, this is the moment that either Sam or Dean, whoever wakes up first, disentangles from the other. This is the moment, also, that Sam pretends that he doesn’t want to have sex with his brother. But today… today is very different and it makes Sam question himself. Is it okay to keep cuddling? Can Sam show the affection he wants to give? Are they still just brothers or are they something more now?

His head is a complete mess, like it always seems to be around Dean lately. He wants this, _so_ much, but he’s scared that he’s going to make a mistake or that Dean will change his mind. Would Dean change his mind at this point? With… whatever they have right now? Sam can’t say for sure. Usually, Dean is set in his ways and in his morals. So much so that it’s impossible to make him bulge, which can be very annoying, of course, though Sam secretly thinks it reassuring.

But this time? Sam feels like he’s in a no-man’s-land. Dean told him _no_ and so Sam had to put a cross on his hope, knowing that nothing would ever, _ever_ happen. Or so he thought. Dean hasn’t stopped _looking_ and _touching_ for a while and it has been _maddening_. And then there’s last night… Dean can’t possibly tell him to forget everything, right? That it was a mistake? Because, seriously, who kisses his brother accidently?

“Sammy,” Dean suddenly grumbles in the teen’s neck. “Stop thinking, it’s distracting.”

Immediately, Sam relaxes, knowing by the way Dean is acting that everything is fine between the two of them. They’ll have to talk, of course, but they’re _fine_. And knowing that Dean isn’t going to give some bullshit excuse and that he’s actually acknowledging _them_ is just such a relief. It gives Sam a giddy feeling in the pit of his stomach. He’s so happy that he can’t even stop this stupid smile from appearing on his face or the crushing hug he gives Dean.

Dean chuckles softly, sounding sleepy still, before sighing contentedly. Sam eventually loosens his arms.

“So… yeah?” Sam asks, having a hard time finding his words. It’s like they’re escaping him. “We’re, like, a thing now?”

Dean nods minutely but doesn’t add anything more which makes Sam roll his eyes fondly.

“You sure?” the teen prods eventually, wanting to be a hundred percent certain. “I mean… you never mentioned being into… guys.”

Dean grunts this time, burrowing closer to his brother. “I’m not. But I’m into you.”

Sam isn’t too sure how he should feel about that. On one hand, it’s like he’s falling a bit more in love, rejoicing in the fact that he has such an effect on Dean. On the other hand… he has to wonder if it’s going to be enough. Does Dean like Sam enough that he can pass over the fact that Sam has bits that don’t really interest Dean?

“Yeah?” he mumbles uncertainly.

At that, Dean stirs slightly, getting his arms around the teen. “Mh-hmm. Definitely.” And it has to be magic, because, then, Dean proceeds to sooth every doubt still hanging in Sam’s mind. “I like looking at your hands. I like how big they are. Strong. And your height. So tall. But do you know what I love the best?”

Sam has to swallow before answering. “What?”

Dean tilts his head slightly so that he can speak directly in Sam’s ear. “I love how you try to hide how hard I can get you,” he says softly as he pushes his thigh against Sam’s groin, making the teen groan almost imperceptibly. It’s stupid how fast his cock is filling up. “You barely need me to look or touch to get you going. And then you try to adjust yourself with those sinful hands of yours, but, fuck, you can’t really _hide_ , can you?”

Sam can’t control himself at that. He grinds his cock against Dean’s thigh, letting a small moan escape his mouth. Because, heck, how can he not? He imagined being pressed up against his brother like this multiple times. But he never thought Dean would talk to him like that. Like out of a porno. Sam is vaguely aware that he should laugh at the other man for being this cliché, but the talk is too hot to be amusing.

Sam’s reaction makes Dean chuckle smugly. “See?” he asks as he gently runs his fingers on the teen’s chest. “So easy.”

“Dean,” Sam breathes, not sure if he’s warning Dean or pleading him. He knows that they shouldn’t do anything in case Adam decides to go look for them. At the same time, Sam really wants to come. Maybe if they lock the door?

Dean laughs quietly before suddenly standing, taking his warmth with him. Sam blinks. It takes him a few seconds before understanding what is happening.

“Come on,” Dean tells him, still smug. “We won’t have any time to train if we don’t go soon.”

Well Sam couldn’t care less about training right now. He’s leaking precome and his cock is throbbing almost painfully. But Dean clearly has his mind made up, so Sam keeps his complaints to himself and gets out of bed. He’ll try to convince his brother later.

***

Fortunately, Adam seems to have understood his lesson because he doesn’t bother them at all. For breakfast, he made himself a bowl of cereals, not asking for anything fancy. After that, he watched a bit of TV before working on his project without any prompting.

Sam is just happy that the kid is reasonable and not yanking Dean’s chain, like yesterday. But he still hates the fact that they’re literally stuck to Adam’s side. Sam and Dean are both having a hard time staying in the house, probably because they’re both so unused to staying indoors for so long.

And, well… it’s starting to get old for another reason too. They’ve both been looking at the other since this morning. More than usual and with more heat than normal. Sam has been hard, on and off, for about three hours now and his balls hurt with the constant pressure.

It doesn’t take long before Dean finally gets fed up and rises from the couch where they were both watching some stupid reality show. Sam jumps to his feet, his blood boiling with lust, and quickly follows his brother to the dinning room where Adam is still working on his project. As soon as the two enters the room, Adam looks up with a slightly worried expression on his face.

“Sam and I are going out,” Dean announces to the boy.

The two brothers are about to turn around and leave, anticipation clear in the air, but Adam stops them, distressed.

“You can’t leave me all alone!” the boy exclaims quickly, his face completely white. “Please,” he adds hastily once the brothers look back at him, annoyed.

Dean huffs angrily and Sam hopes the man is just going to find a miracle solution to this problem. They _need_ to get away from Adam. But, he knows, there isn’t much they can do since the _did_ agree to keep an eye on the kid.

“You’re ten years old,” Dean still tries. “You don’t need us to look after you. And we’ll only be gone for three hours.”

Fuck. Wouldn’t that be awesome? Three hours in a shady motel room, Sam guesses, where they can just mess around without anyone to bother them. Where they can just learn the body of the other… Sam wonders how many times he can come in three hours.

“Please, please don’t leave me alone,” Adam pleads tearfully as he makes himself as small as possible. “Or… can I follow you?”

Sam sighs disappointed. Fuck Adam. How can the kid be this distressed about being alone for a few hours? It’s not like they’ll be gone for days. It’s not like Adam is somewhere unfamiliar. It’s not like he has to keep a close eye on his neighbours, afraid that the shady men are going to try something. It’s not like he can’t call his parents to come and get him.

Dean turns slightly just to catch Sam’s eye. The message is clear and the teen feels like bashing his head on the wall in frustration. He has to remind himself that his dad and Kate are supposed to come back tonight. Then they can leave the family behind in just a few hours.

“Fine,” Dean finally agrees. “Go get your shoes, we’re going out.”

Adam complies immediately, leaving his project on the table. When Dean walks out of the dinning room, however, he heads towards their shared room instead of the entry. Sam joins Dean, curious. He freezes once he sees the man shouldering one of their bags. The one with their guns and ammo.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Sam hisses in alarm.

Dean shrugs, looking put out. “I need to get the frustration out of my system somehow.”

Sam can’t speak for a second. This is such a bad idea. “Putting Adam with guns is asking for trouble.”

Of course, it just makes Dean roll his eyes at his younger brother. “We’ll be there to watch over him so that he doesn’t hurt himself. Plus, he _is_ a Winchester. He needs to know how to handle a gun.”

Sam shakes his head in aggravation. At least, he doesn’t feel like his balls are going to explode at any moment now. “You’re an idiot. You better keep an eye on him alright, because this is not my problem,” he says before turning and walking away.

“Prissy bitch,” Dean mutters and it might make Sam smile despite how irritated he feels.

***

The walk to an unknown spot in the wood takes about half an hour. A very awkward half-hour in Sam’s opinion. Adam is a nervous follower, assuredly wondering where the hell they are going. Dean is being pig-headed about the whole situation. And Sam has been glaring at his older brother the whole time, trying to manipulate Dean into going back home.

“Here should be good,” Dean eventually says before dropping the duffle bag on the ground.

Sam sighs as he looks around, resigned. The place is secure enough. They aren’t too close from the city, so there shouldn’t be anyone this deep in the wood. The trees are also spaced out enough that they can see and not shoot something by mistake.

Adam squirms, looking terribly unsure. “Um… what are we doing here?” he asks quietly.

“Shooting,” Dean answers absently as he takes a gun out from his duffle bag. Out of habit, he checks if there are enough bullets left.

“What?” Adam squeaks uneasily. There might even be a glimmer of panic in his eyes.

It makes Sam sigh a second time, feeling even more aggravated. He loves the man. He truly does. But Dean doesn’t always make the wisest choices.

“There you go,” Dean says as he puts the gun in Adam’s shaky hands.

Sam jumps into action, unable to let this catastrophe go on. Sure, he said that he didn’t want to be involved, but he does _not_ want to come back home injured. “Oh my God, Dean!” he yells just as he takes the gun away from Adam. “You can’t just put a gun in his hands!”

Dean smirks at the teen and some part of Sam knows that his brother is just being a little shit. He clearly just manipulated the situation, roping Sam into his schemes without even really trying. Which would be very insulting normally, but Sam is too concerned for their health.

“Here,” Sam says almost aggressively at Adam as he shoves the gun in front of the boy’s face. “This here is the safety. _It stays on until we tell you it’s alright to shoot_ , you hear me?”

Adam nods rapidly, looking less uneasy and more excited suddenly. Sam inhales deeply, cursing Dean internally, before explaining how to aim and shoot properly. Meanwhile, Dean places a few cans on the ground a few feet away. The cans, of course, are much closer than what the brothers are used to, but it’s the perfect distance for a beginner.

“So you think you can do this?” Sam asks once he’s done with his explanations. Adam nods quickly, still eager.

Dean then joins Sam and they both take a few steps back, letting Adam have some space. “Okay, now I want you to aim towards a can,” Sam instructs the boy.

Adam follows the order to the letter, not trying to go faster. Sam breathes a bit easier as he looks over the kid’s shoulder. He can see that Adam is going to miss, but not by much. He could try to give some advice, but he’s pretty sure practice is going to be more helpful at this point.

“Good enough. You can take the safety off and you shoot just _once_ , alright?” Sam warns Adam.

The boy nods before doing as said. He pulls the trigger and immediately stumble a few steps back, recoiling from the force behind the shot. The bullet is lodged in the ground, a few inches away from his target. He turns to face the brothers, a big amazed smile on his face.

“Wow!” he yells before taking aim a second time, not seeming to notice that he missed. “Can I go again?”

Sam shares a look with Dean, both amused by Adam’s enthusiasm.

“Yeah,” Dean says. “Just be careful to aim properly, okay?”

And so that’s how they pass their afternoon. They watch as Adam shoots bullet after bullet, getting better as the time goes by. They give more advice when the boy needs it and they place the cans further away when it seems to become too easy for Adam. Sam and Dean also take their turn with the gun, impressing Adam a lot.

Eventually, they pack everything in the duffle bag and they leave the forest. The walk back home is less awkward than the one earlier and Sam is thankful for the respite, though Adam has started being annoying again.

“That was _awesome!_ ” the kid keeps repeating, his eyes shinning. “Can we do this again? _Please!_ ”

And Dean answers the same thing over and over again. “Maybe. We’ll see.”

It’s as they finally land on the road where the Milligans live that they see Kate and John as they unpack the car in front of the house, effectively distracting Adam.

“Mom! Dad!” the boy yells before running towards his parents, leaving Sam and Dean behind without a thought.

At that, the brothers look at each other. _Finally_.


	11. Pleasure

Sam and Dean don’t even need to talk or look at each other to know what they need to do. Dean, since he hasn’t been seen by John, sneaks behind a neighbour’s home to enter through the back of the Milligan house to hide the duffle bag.

Meanwhile, Sam approaches the family, a fake smile on his face. He watches as Kate puts down her suitcase to hug her son and as his dad stands besides the two. As soon as Kate is done with Adam, she glances up towards the teen.

“Everything went alright?” she asks as Adam runs to John.

Sam nods while noticing that his dad and Kate both seem tired. “Yeah, no problem.”

Kate relaxes before diving into her purse which she left just beside her suitcase. She rummages in it for a few seconds; Adam jumping up and down while begging his dad to play soccer with him.

“There we go,” Kate mutters as she pulls out five twenty dollar bills. She hands them to Sam with a smile.

The teen takes the money, not really understanding what is going on. “Uh… thanks?” he says, uncertain.

Kate sees the confusion in the boy’s eyes and her smile turns slightly bitter. “I’m paying you and Dean for babysitting Adam. You know… for helping me.”

Sam scowls at his hand where he’s holding the money. They’re seriously getting payed for keeping an eye on Adam? What are they? Rich, spoiled kid? Damn! Sam is really tempted to just give the bills back. His pride doesn’t want to accept this meaningless pity.

“Sure, kiddo,” Sam hears his dad say in the background. “We’ll play once we’ve taken everything inside.”

A growl gets stuck in Sam’s throat at hearing those words. He’s very close to making a scene. But. He knows that Dean, if he were here, would swallow his pride. He would grin charmingly at Kate and take the money. Because, a hundred bucks? It isn’t anything to scoff at.

So Sam tries to smile thankfully. It must look normal because Kate brightens. “Thank you, Kate.”

“No problem, sweetie,” she says as she lightly grips his shoulder.

Sam tenses at the gesture and the endearment but he endures. Kate eventually lets him go, thank Heaven, to pull her luggage inside the house. John follows after her, his own luggage and Adam in tow. Just as they all are about to enter the house, that’s when Dean comes out of the front door, the duffle bag now safely hidden.

“Dean!” Kate exclaims happily. “Thank you so much for your help! I gave some money to Sam so you can share, alright?”

Dean nods with a smile, not even looking surprised though Sam knows that he has to be. “Will do,” The young man says as he steps aside so that the little family can step inside. “Sam and I are going to go out for a bit.”

“Oh.” Kate sounds a bit disappointed. She looks at John before turning back towards Dean. “Are you sure? Your father wanted to talk to the both of you…”

There is a tense second where they all glance at each other, wary. John sighs, looking slightly defeated. “Nah… You boys take the night off. We’ll talk another time. Here, you can take the Impala,” he says as he throws the keys to his eldest son.

The boys don’t need to hear it twice.

***

As Dean asks for a room at a hotel twenty minutes away from the Milligan house, he silently thanks Kate. Sure, he planned earlier to take Sam somewhere private, but now, with the money they got from the woman, they can actually afford a room that isn’t in a crap motel in which the bed covers haven’t been changed for at least twenty years.

It might be the romantic in Dean but… he wants their first time to be special. After all this is Sammy, not just a girl whose name he’s going to forget the next morning.

“There you go, sir,” the receptionist, a young blond woman, says with a fixed smile as she places the key card to their room on the counter right in front of Dean. Clearly, she doesn’t think two boys should share a single bed, but she stays professional. “Have a nice stay.”

“Sure will,” Dean tells her with his biggest smug look. Her smile turns a bit frosty.

Sam sighs and quickly drags him away, heading towards the staircase. “Do you really have to do stuff like that?” the teen hisses at him as they scale to the second floor.

“What?” Dean asks, twirling the card in his hand. He feels jittery. “She clearly was constipated.”

Sam huffs at his brother, though the tips of his lips are tilting up.

“Uh… should be this one,” Dean changes the subject as he points to a door a few feet away. They both walk up to it, confirming it’s the right room. Dean swipes the key card and they both enter.

Dean barely takes the time to notice how much nicer the room looks than every motel they’ve ever been too. He sees the clean, white curtains. The modern bedcovers. The unstained rug. It seems just perfect for Dean.

Sam closes the door behind him and Dean immediately tackles the teen against the wall. Dean doesn’t let his little brother recover from his surprise, kissing Sam hungrily. He drags a hand in the teen’s long hair only to grab a few locks and pull Sam’s head at an angle.

“Ah…” Sam moans in Dean’s mouth as his breathing grows harsher. All his blood seems to circulate unnaturally faster in his whole body, making his face hot and his cock hard.

“Sammy…” Dean murmurs between nips on Sam’s lips. He then eases the sting with careful little licks. “So sweet.”

“Mmmph…” Sam lets his head hang against Dean’s shoulder as Dean lets go of his hair, feeling a strain of anxiety. He doesn’t really _know_ what to do though his body is quite onboard with anything sexual. Like, what is he supposed to do with his hands? He’s pretty sure he shouldn’t let them hang in the air. So he lifts them, gently, until they come into contact with Dean’s hips. And then, because he can, he slides them under his brother’s shirt, tracing every inch of skin.

“Fuck… so innocent Sammy,” Dean mutters quietly as he nuzzles the teen’s neck. “So innocent.”

A part of Sam is humbled at how awed Dean sounds. Another part is ticked of. He doesn’t like that he has zero experience when Dean has plenty of it. What if he’s not enough? He isn’t stupid. This is going to be the first time his brother is going to get it on with a dude and… well, gay sex isn’t as easy. Certainly not the first time when you don’t exactly know what to expect.

“Stop thinking, Sammy.”

Sam takes a deep breath, trying to do exactly as Dean told him.

“That’s it,” Dean says as he gently runs his hands over every single limb of Sam he can reach. The semi-massage seems to relax the teen even further. “How about you take your clothes off?”

Sam nods at the suggestion, leaning back against the wall. He starts stripping, taking his light coat and shirt off first. The task is way harder than it should be with Dean not giving him any space, but he makes do. He pulls his belt off and he’s trying to figure out how he’s going to get his jeans down with Dean plastered to him when the young man suddenly drops to his knees.

“Oh, Dean,” Sam breathes, watching as Dean rips his pants and underwear down. “Suck me,” Sam suddenly orders. The demand surprises the two brothers, but then Dean smiles before engulfing Sam’s dick into his mouth.

“Holly shit!” Sam reacts instantly, closing his eyes and bashing his head back against the wall in surprise and pleasure. The wet feeling of a mouth on his cock is very, very different from his hand. Much better too. He has to force himself not to move as Dean sucks him. “Shit, Dean!”

He has to look. He just has to. Sam opens his eyes and looks down. He sees Dean, on his knees, as if he’s begging to have Sam’s dick. And his lips! Stretched out over his cock and glistening with spit.

Sam feels all of his doubts leaving him as his eyes connect with his brother’s. Dean isn’t awkward. He’s _glowing_ with hunger in front of Sam’s naked form. And damn if it doesn’t send a delicious thrill down the teen’s spine.

Despite himself, Sam grabs Dean by the hair, inciting the man to suck deeper. Dean moans even as he struggles to take the length.

“Dean, Dean, Dean…” Sam chants, feeling the head of his dick hitting the back of his brother’s throat. Like sharp sparks of pleasure exploding in his groin. As the sensations build, Sam feels his balls tightening and he knows that he’s close to coming.

Sam reluctantly pushes Dean away.

 “That was so good, Dean,” Sam praises, as he wipes the excess spit on Dean’s lips and chin. The man looks perfectly debauched and it reassures Sam. He smiles. “Take your clothes off and then on the bed. With your legs spread. I want to see everything.”

Dean doesn’t know how to react to this. Hearing those words makes him… well, he’s not sure. _Legs spread_ , goddamn! Like a girl! He’s going to look like a slut. But… it’s also really hot how Sam is being so controlling. It makes his dick jerk in anticipation.

The young man stands up and quickly sheds his clothes. He walks to the bed and then crawls on it, leaving a pack of lube on the pillow, until he’s at the center of the mattress. He flops on his back and, after a brief moment of hesitation, folds his legs up and apart.

Sam watches the whole things, more turned on than he has ever been. He loves how careful Dean seems to be and how Dean can’t take his eyes off of him.

“Do you like what you see?” Dean asks Sam. The teen nods, slowly coming closer, like a predator that has an eye on his prey. “Because I do,” Dean says, devouring the sight of his little brother so… dangerous looking. “Can I touch you?”

Sam nods again and Dean’s hand reaches out, the fingers barely able to brush against Sam’s chest. Sam smirks before indulging his brother. He crawls on the bed and over Dean, encasing the man in a cocoon of limbs. Sam’s pupils dilate.

“Hmm… That’s much better,” Dean says.

Dean slides his hands down Sam’s chest, feeling skin, the sparse hair, every muscle and a few scars. He marvels at how _strong_ Sam is. At how much the teen grew. But then, he reaches down to what really interests him: Sam’s cock. He closes his hand over the member, appreciating how long it feels. Longer, but slimmer than his own.

“You like that?” Dean asks as Sam jerks in his hand. “It _is_ a nice cock, that’s for sure.”

Sam moans at the words. “Dean, your fucking mouth,” he growls as he pulls at Dean’s hair, baring the man’s throat.

Dean groans in need and Sam dips down to lick a line across Dean’s collarbone. Sam climbs up, nipping the skin until he reaches the jaw. Then, he kisses Dean fully on the mouth. It turns filthy quite rapidly with Sam feeding Dean his own tongue and Dean panting hungrily as he grabs every bit of skin he can reach. Keeping his big brother distracted, Sam discreetly opens the small pack of lube Dean left on the pillow and starts circling the man’s hole with wet fingers.

Dean doesn’t react to the sensation, still completely engrossed in the kiss. Sam gently pushes a finger inside, being as careful as he can be.

Fortunately, Dean breathes out calmly into the sensation instead of freaking out, canting his hips for an easier access. Sam feels himself relaxing as he pushes in, more firmly. He lets his finger explore until he brushes against the gland he was looking for.

“Yes!” Dean yells as his body arches against Sam. “Fuck, more! Don’t stop!”

Sam leans away to properly see Dean’s expression as he keeps fucking him open. He likes how out of control his brother is. He also likes how Dean keeps his eyes firmly on him.

Starting to grow impatient, Sam adds another finger. He plunges in and out gently but relentlessly, Dean moaning all the while. The third finger takes a bit more adjusting to and Sam slows down, not wanting to hurt the man in his impatience.

“Okay… yeah, I’m ready. Come on, now,” Dean begs, his face completely flushed and with hair sticking to his face.

Sam removes his fingers carefully just as he tenderly kisses Dean one last time. He takes hold of his dick after lubing it and places himself against Dean’s hole when the man suddenly tenses.

“We don’t have any condoms,” Dean announces, unable to believe he actually forgot to bring some.

“What?” Sam asks, feeling like a bucket of ice fell over him.

“I… I forgot the condoms.” Dean was so focused on bringing the lube, knowing they wouldn’t be able to do anything without the precious liquid, that he hadn’t thought about condoms. Why now?

Sam’s eyes glint dangerously. He _needs_ to come right the fuck _now_. “We don’t need them,” he decides, wanting to be inside Dean as soon as possible.

Dean doesn’t let go however. “It really isn’t safe…”

Sam snaps, unable to contain his frustration when all of his nerves are on fire from an orgasm that seems to be just around the corner. “Dean! I’m a virgin! I’m perfectly healthy! And though you screwed around, I’m sure you were safe, right?”

Dean nods.

“Ever noticed having trouble peeing? Ever found any blisters? Rashes? Warts? Ulcers?”

Dean makes a face. This sounds painful. “No!”

Sam grabs Dean closer to him. “Then shut up and let me fuck you.”

Damn it all. It’s not like Dean has his every wit with him at the moment and his engorged cock is demanding to be satisfied. So he shuts his mouth, letting Sam gently push his dick against his asshole.

Dean breathes deeply, relaxing his muscles as much as he can until Sam suddenly breaches him. Dean tenses and hisses in pain at the alien feeling. God, he feels like something is trying to break him in two.

 Sam stops moving as soon as Dean seems to be in pain. His heart beats awfully fast. The feeling of being _inside_ Dean is incredible and he wants to push forward so bad. But he stays still, waiting as Dean adjusts.

Tenderly, Sam rubs his hand on the man’s chest. Once Dean’s breathing grows more normal, Sam takes his brother’s cock and slowly jerks him off, coaxing him to get hard again.

Dean starts moaning not long afterwards. He also cants his hips on way and the other, more used now to the feeling of Sam’s cock inside of him. It feels less like he’s going to break and more like he’s full.

“Move… oh shit, move!” he asks desperately.

Sam takes a shaky breath before letting go Dean’s cock. Instead, he grabs his brother’s leg and places it on his shoulder, giving himself a better access, before sliding forward.

Dean’s breath hitches at the weird but awesome friction. He gets harder as Sam lunges further and further inside of him, until their pelvis and ass meet.

“Fuck, Sammy,” Dean groans. “So good. You feel so good.”

Sam moans at the praise, liking how Dean dirty talks in bed.

“So good just for me,” Dean breathes as Sam slowly switches angles, looking for Dean’s prostate. “Good boy. Such a good boy. But you know what would make it better?”

Sam shakes his head just as the tingle of his orgasm is starting to make itself known. Damn, he needs to make Dean come soon. “What, baby?”

“I want… I want you to jerk me off. Please jerk me off!” Dean pleads, knowing he needs a little bit more. “I need it, Sammy.”

Sam moans long and hard as he takes hold of Dean’s dick. He starts pumping, his movement fast and jerky, but it doesn’t matter because something explodes inside of Dean and then the man’s cock throbs as long ropes of semen splash unto his stomach.

“Ah! Ah!” Dean yells with his head thrown back.

Sam follows not long after. As he comes, he drops down on Dean, his whole body shivering. He groans in the crook between Dean’s neck and shoulder before finally quieting.

The two brothers simply breathe for a few minutes, coming back from the high. Sam eventually becomes flaccid but, still, they don’t let go of each other.

“That was…” Sam breaks the silence though he gets stuck there.

“Awesome,” Dean mumbles with a smile.

Sam nods. “Yeah… It was…” he struggles to find a more appropriate word but fails. “Yeah.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait! I've been busy with work!
> 
> Anyway, I hope it was a good chapter! This was Sam's first time, so, I promise, he's going to grow more confident with time! I'm going to make him more dominant than he is right now.
> 
> If you have any suggestion, please tell me!


	12. Finally Listening

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I'm just sending this question like that, but I've had a few people asking about a gen version of this story. Personally, I don't have the time (with school, work and upcoming wedding), but if there's someone out there that would like to write it? It would make some people happy!

It wasn’t the plan to stay overnight at the hotel room. But when Sam opens his eyes the next morning, he isn’t surprised to see that the light coming in through the window is now a pale yellow instead of a soft blue, what with the amount of sex they turned out to have. His eyes glance quickly at the clock on the nightstand. It’s only 6h52 in the morning.

He closes his eyes. They can skip training today. Not like Dean would be any good with how sore he should feel right now. And since Sam is still suspended from school… They just have to be sure to leave before Dean’s shift at work. They can walk back home at…

Shit.

Sam sits up so fast he gets dizzy for a few seconds. They have the Impala. John can’t go to work without his car. Well… Sam rolls his eyes. _Of course_ , John could walk, but it’s his car and they don’t need an angry father at the present.

He stands up and searches for Dean’s pants. He finds them near the bed and quickly squats down to look through the pockets. He pulls out his brother’s cellphone to find multiple missed texts and calls. All from their dad. Sam’s face scrunches in a grimace. This isn’t going to be fun.

The teen scrolls through the messages, surprised to find John’s tone quite composed, when he hears Dean grumbling.

“Sam…” the man mumbles, his voice husky. It sends a pleasant shiver down Sam’s spine. “What are you doing there?”

Sam drops the cellphone on the pair of jeans before crawling back into bed. With some maneuvering, he pushes Dean on his back and then he just flops down on his brother, enjoying the contact between their naked skin.

“Fell asleep,” Sam informs Dean, though it is quite obvious. “We have to bring back the car to dad before he goes to work.”

“Oh shit,” Dean says, voice still rough from sleep. He opens an eye to look at the time. “Hmm… five more minutes and then we leave.” With that, he closes his eyes and hugs Sam close to him.

They both wish they could stay more than five minutes.

***

When they arrive at the Milligan’s home, the small family is already awake and every member is rustling through their morning routine. Kate is running behind Adam, prompting him to go faster while John is eating his breakfast with his eyes fixed on the newspaper.

The brothers further enter the house, trying to pass the dinning room quietly, but Kate still sees them.

“Oh! Dean! Sam!” she rushes to them with a big smile, looking relieved. “We were so worried! You weren’t answering your phones. Everything went alright?”

Kate is very sincere, Sam notes. But it’s easy to see that John wasn’t concerned at all. Not with the way he barely glances at his two eldest sons.

Dean shrugs, a winning smile painted on his face. “Everything went perfectly fine!” he says, his enjoyment way too pronounced. Sam knows Dean needs to be sarcastic because Kate is stifling. Why couldn’t they just enter the house, give the keys to their dad and then disappear into their room? “We had _so_ much fun! Right, Sammy?”

John lifts his head to stare at his boys, a confused expression on his face. It makes Sam blush as he glares at Dean. It’s fine to laugh a bit, but they could try to be more discreet. “ _Yes_ , Dean. We had a lot of fun.”

Dean’s lips twitch in amusement at Sam’s slight frustration before he ruffles his little brother’s hair.

Sam sighs but lets Dean have his fun. “Dean. I’m not a little kid anymore.”

Dean, the bastard, laughs. And, of course, it makes Sam warm inside. But the feeling leaves quickly when he sees how Kate is looking at them. Like she’s happy that they’re acting so relaxed in her home.

“Okay… well… here are the keys,” Dean eventually says when he notices the look on Kate’s face. He throws the kays at John, who catches them without any trouble.

Sensing that the brothers are about to head to their room, Kate turns urgently to John. “Didn’t you want to talk with your sons?”

John’s expression stays blank and Sam and Dean get tenser and tenser as the seconds stretch. The man’s eyes slide to the side, glancing at the clock before shrugging. “I need to go to work soon. We’ll talk when we have more time. Tonight probably.”

Kate seems disappointed at those words but she still smiles bravely at the brothers. “Okay then… Um… Don’t forget we’re meeting with the principal today, Sam.”

 _Fuck_ , the teen thinks. Not that he had forgotten, but… he sure had _tried_ to. The start of their day was awesome. How come it crashed so fast?

“I won’t,” he mutters before following Dean to their room.

***

Driving with Kate to school is awkward. More than awkward. The only thing that makes it bearable is the fact that Kate clearly isn’t comfortable either. She doesn’t try to act like a concerned mother and she doesn’t try to support him either. She’s _dreading_ this meeting as a person that barely knows Sam.

And Sam feels grateful. While it lasts.

The walk to the principal’s office isn’t fun either, especially since they arrive right as the bell rings for a break, meaning Kate is tensing under the students’ eyes as they pass by the two of them. Sam sees Jordan at the end of the hallway. The idiot seems awfully smug at seeing the teen with his ‘mom’, but Sam has to grin internally at how swollen and how green Jordan’s cheek still is.

And then, Sam doesn’t think about Jordan anymore when they land in front of the principal’s office. They pause there. Kate inhales deeply, clutching her leather purse against her. She gives a small, thin smile at Sam before knocking on the door.

It barely takes a few seconds before the principal opens the door with a grim look on his face… until his eyes fall on Kate. His forehead creases in confusion. “Oh… uh… Mrs. Winchester, I presume?”

Sam has to stop himself from snorting. Kate smiles politely, her face paler than normal. “It’s Milligan actually. Kate Milligan.” The principal throws a worried glance at Sam, evidence starting to stack up into a grim picture. Kate sees the look and quickly adds “I’m Sam’s step-mother.”

The man seems relieved as he invites the two inside. He closes the door before walking around his desk to sit in his plush chair and Sam and Kate head towards the two other seats. It is only when they are all comfortably seated that the principal finally acknowledges the elephant in the room.

“Well,” he starts as he laces his fingers on top of his desk. “I wanted to talk about our zero tolerance policy concerning violence in this school.”

The silence is defining after that sentence and Sam realises that the principal could be thinking about expelling him right there. Somehow, it doesn’t really bother Sam. He _does_ want to finish high school. But he has been in so many of them, how hard will it truly be to go into another one?

“We don’t accept fights in this school,” the man continues, stern. “Neither do we accept bullying.”

Sam feels his mouth twist in frustration. Of course Jordan said that _Sam_ insulted him… And he didn’t! He just… said some hard truths.

The principal’s face hardens and Kate eyes Sam in some confusion. “Well… what happened exactly?” the woman asks softly.

The principal blinks blankly before answering. “Mr. Brown has reported that Mr. Winchester insulted him with mean comments about Mr. Brown’s supposed sexuality, which can be distressing to teenagers as I think you’ll agree with me, before punching him in the face.”

Kate clears her throat, uncomfortable, before expressing herself. “Uh… And what has Sam said?”

The principal looks at the teen and his tight expression loosens some. Like he’s second guessing himself. “Sam hasn’t said much.”

Kate’s face twists. “Because he told me a very different story. The way I understand it, that boy is the one that insulted Sam and Sam was also pushed before he punched the boy.”

The principal sighs, seeming older all of a sudden. He turns to the teen. “Is that true?”

Sam shrugs before nodding as he starts tapping his heel on the floor. God, can’t this just end?

The principal sighs loudly and rubs his hands on his face. “Damnit,” he mutters almost imperceptibly. He then straightens up, determined. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

Sam shrugs a second time, feeling Kate’s and the man’s eyes on him as he stares outside through the window. “What would it change? You’d already made your mind.”

The principal’s face falls slightly. He _had_ made his mind. A lot of teachers had come to talk to him about Sam Winchester and how the boy wasn’t socialising with anyone. How angry he looked all the time. And now with that situation, how hard was it to accept that the teen had finally snapped?

Grave error, the principal is realising. Sam clearly has a special family situation. He can see it now. It was Sam’s brother that filled all the paperwork for Sam to enter the school. Sam’s dad doesn’t seem to want to meet the principal. And now, this Kate. Clearly, she and Sam aren’t close at all.

Sam most probably is a victim of something bigger than Jordan Brown. But one thing at a time.

“I’m very sorry,” he tells the teen, meaning it. “How about you explain to me what happened?”

***

Sam leaves the school, feeling slightly dazed. He never thought that the principal would apologize. Fuck! He never thought that he would revoke his suspension and tell him that he could come back to school tomorrow with the only condition that he meets with the school’s therapist.

“Well!” Kate says as they enter her car, a big smile on her face. “That went well.”

Sam makes a noise from the back of his throat. Not quite agreeing, not quite disagreeing. Kate starts the car and she maneuvers the vehicle out of the parking lot. They drive quietly for a few minutes, with Kate constantly glancing at Sam from time to time.

“ _What?_ ” Sam eventually snaps when the glances are starting to grate on his nerves.

Kate’s eyes snap back to the road in front of her. “Uh… Sorry. I just… Can I ask you something?”

Sam sighs, tired. He knows he won’t like it. “What?” he asks more gently.

“I was… uh… I know that living with us is a big change for you and your brother. I guess I was just wondering… are you okay?”

Sam tries very, very hard not to laugh. He _does_. But it escapes him and it’s not pretty. “Am I okay?”

Kate soldiers on. “I know it’s a big change and I know that your father is not making this easy…”

“Not making this easy?” Now Sam is getting angry. Saying that John is not making this easy is like saying that whales are kind of big. And it’s stupid. So stupid. Sam shouldn’t care that things are unfair right now. He should be over feeling disappointed, sad and angry all the fucking time when talking or thinking about his dad.

But he can’t. So he explodes. “You have _no_ fucking idea how hard things have been!” he yells loudly in the small vehicle. “Dad left us alone _all_ the time. He’d tell us that he would be gone for a few days and he come back weeks later! Of course, he left money on the counter, but we always knew that we would have to stretch it as much as possible. You don’t have any idea how much Kraft Dinner we’ve eaten because we didn’t have a dad to make sure that we ate healthy food. My dad hasn’t ever helped me with homework. Didn’t have any fucking time. Can’t even remember the last time we celebrated Christmas!

“And then we learned the evening before we came to join you that we had a fucking brother. We had no clue you even existed! And I bet that dad was there for every single one of Adam’s birthday, but he sure hasn’t been there for any of mine in the last four years.

“So we come here after all those years of being scared that dad might not come back, of not having enough food on the table, of him being absent on important days, and he expects us to live like a fucking happy family? _Yeah_. He’s not making this fucking easy!” Sam growls before falling silent.

The only noise they can hear for the next few minutes is the sound of the road under the wheels and the wind that beats against the car. Sam stares determinedly to his right, not seeing anything, trying not to feel anything. It’s so hard to control his anger.

His thoughts are cut short when he hears a soft sniff beside him. He waits a bit, listening carefully as his anger slowly melts away. He hears it again and turns to see Kate, tears sliding down her face.

It surprises him. “Uh…”

“Gosh!” Kate cries and she wipes her cheeks, uselessly, as fresh tears keep falling. “I’m so sorry!”

Sam is bewildered. He doesn’t understand how Kate keeps feeling things for Dean and him. Why does she care so much? “Why are you sorry?” He can’t say that she hasn’t done anything because, clearly, she did. She kept seeing his dad and she had Adam, but still.

She sniffs once more. “I… I’m sorry because I never thought… I always thought you were alright. I wondered why John came so often without his boys and where he left you. But he always told me you were at your uncle’s.”

Sam sighs. “We weren’t,” he says softly.

A sob escapes Kate’s throat and then silence falls in the car for the rest of the drive.


	13. Mother's Tenderness

Sam has seen a lot of things in his short life. He considers himself to be a strong, smart and resourceful person. He doesn’t get scared easily and he doesn’t have a problem dirtying his hands a bit.

He can’t say, however, that he has ever been prepared for anything Kate related.

As soon as they park the car, Sam tries to weave his way through the house to hide himself in his room but Kate doesn’t let him. Of course not.

She grabs his arm and she drags him to the kitchen. Sam is very close to snapping at the woman for a second time in the same day but then he sees her expression and he closes his mouth. In that moment, Kate seems very fierce despite her red, puffy eyes and Sam knows that he shouldn’t cross her right now.

So he simply sits at the kitchen table as Kate takes a knife and a green apple. She starts cutting the fruit into quarters. The silence between the two is very heavy. And Sam doesn’t have a clue why Kate wanted to have him here with her.

Once Kate is done cutting the apple, she puts the quarters in a plate and then she brings the whole thing to the table. She deposits the plate right in front of the teen before sitting down herself, right beside Sam.

The teen looks at the plate and then at Kate. That can’t… What is she doing?

“Eat,” she tells the teen.

She keeps staring at Sam and it’s… unnerving. Sam doesn’t bend in front of monsters. He’s smart enough to get himself out of any situation. But, here, he can see there’s no escape possible. Not when you’re experiencing the brunt of Kate’s motherly tenderness. He eats the damn apple under her watchful gaze.

“Sam,” she starts, her voice full of steel. “Do you want me to call the authorities?”

Sam honestly doesn’t know where this is coming from. The authorities. What would he need the authorities for? “Why?”

Kate frowns, clearly unhappy. “Sam. What your father did was neglect. He abused you and your brother.”

Sam shrugs. He knows they have been abused. Contrary to Dean, he isn’t afraid to admit it. Though Dean might admit it now too… Who knows. They haven’t talked about it much. “Yeah, and?”

Kate’s lips purse in frustration while her eyes dim a bit, like she’s sad. “And it clearly has affected the both of you. Very much so.”

Sam sighs tiredly. He shouldn’t have said anything in the car. He should have kept his damn mouth closed and endure whatever pitying thing Kate had intended to say. He wouldn’t find himself here if he had just controlled himself. “I’m seventeen. What could the authorities even do that I can’t? Heck, if I can’t stand it anymore, I’ll just leave, all right?” Sam tries to clumsily reassure her.

However, it seems to have the opposite reaction. Kate loses all color and she gulps. “Oh my God, you’re not thinking about running away, are you?”

“Uh…” Sam somehow can’t find it in himself to lie to Kate and he finally understands that he’s actually _freaking out_ right now. This comes as a blow to him. Jesus Christ, what the hell is he supposed to do with a… a Kate? How is he supposed to handle her? Dean would know. He’s more people savvy than Sam. Dean is always charming as fuck and he would know exactly what to say for her to calm the fuck down and for her to leave him alone.

Kate stands up and starts pacing when Sam fails to answer. There are tears spilling out of her eyes once more and Sam is frozen in his chair, wondering what is going to happen next.

Eventually, Kate seems to steel herself. She takes the time to grab a few tissues so that she can wipe her tears away and so that she can blow her nose. Sam watches as she throws everything in the trash can, knowing that Kate has come to an important decision.

“Do you have an uncle?” Kate asks as she turns to face Sam. “John kept talking about an uncle.”

“Uh… yeah,” Sam answers truthfully. Bobby is his uncle where it matters.

Kate nods as she looks for a piece of paper and a pen. “And he’s good to you boys?”

“Yeah,” he repeats.

Kate takes a second to look at him, trying to decipher if he’s being truthful. She can’t be certain since she doesn’t really know Sam. “Alright. Give me his name and phone number.”

Sam doesn’t like this at all. He doesn’t need someone looking after him like this. Dean is all he necessitates if he wants someone to fret over him. “I don’t think this is necessary.”

“Sam,” Kate snaps at him, her pen at the ready.

Sam sees how fucking serious she is being about the whole issue. She _really_ wants that phone number. She’s not going to leave him until he gives it to her. Of course, there are plenty of ways for him to simply walk out and not talk to her. Because, let’s be honest here, there’s no way she can keep up with him.

But Sam _might_ still be freaking out a bit. He isn’t used to having someone care about him like this. Except for Dean and Bobby, people don’t care about the Winchester boys. And if, somehow, someone does do something kind, it isn’t _really_ for Dean or him. No. Just like the principal today. He didn’t listen to Sam because he wanted the teen to be comfortable at school, because he _cared_. No. He listened because he wouldn’t have felt good with himself. Which is normal. After all, Sam doesn’t know the principal and the opposite is also true.

So _why_ does Kate give a fuck? Why is she being so, so… maternal? Kate has acted more like a parent towards Sam and Dean than their own father and it… It _pulls_ at some strings in Sam’s heart that he had thought he had hidden from view.

And, because he gets fucking weak for a tiny second, he gives Kate the information she wants.

Kate writes it down before smiling at Sam. The smile is shaky, but it definitely is sincere. Sam is completely floored.

“I’m sorry, sweetie, that your brother and you had to go through all of that,” she says as she comes closer to the teen. She delicately puts her hand on Sam’s shoulder and Sam stops himself from flinching away from her. He doesn’t know why he doesn’t simply shove her away. He should. She’s not his mom and she never will be. But his damn heart is drinking in all the attention Kate is giving him, like a dehydrated man stuck in the desert. “I’ll talk with your father. I’m in your corner and I won’t let the both of you down. You hear me?”

Sam nods, his eyes open wide.

“Good,” Kate tries to smile even wider, but it falls a bit flat. She leaves Sam to walk to a small cupboard over the microwave. Inside, she pulls out an envelop. She takes a few bills of twenties before putting the envelop back where it belongs. She walks to Sam once more and hands him the money.

“I just have one favour to ask of you,” she says kindly as she sits down. “I’m having this conversation with your father tonight. So, if it doesn’t bother you too much, do you think you could handle Adam for a few hours? In fact, as soon as John arrives with Adam, I would really appreciate it if you took him out of the house then. Eat somewhere. Maybe go to the movies afterward.”

Sam clears his throat. “Hum… yeah, sure. No problem.”

Kate nods appreciatively. “Thank you.” She stands up and kisses Sam on the forehead. “John and Adam will arrive at around four. Be prepared.”

She leaves the room and Sam puts a hand to his forehead. He can’t remember anyone ever doing this to him, except for Dean, of course. He doesn’t think he likes it. That spot is Dean’s only.

Doesn’t stop how he feels inside however. Like he rubbed himself against something particularly soft.

***

As soon as John and Adam arrive home, Sam springs to his feet. He leaves his room and heads to the front door.

Kate is already there and she’s hugging her son while completely ignoring her lover. John, in turn, seems confused by Kate’s behaviour.

“Mom!” Adam exclaims enthusiastically, almost vibrating on the spot. “You won’t believe what happened today!”

“I’m so sorry, baby,” Kate interrupts apologetically. “You’ll have to tell me later. I need to talk with your father tonight. But Sam is going to take you to a nice restaurant and you can watch a movie at the theater afterwards!”

Adam loses all trace of happiness. He looks at his mom warily before glancing at John, at Sam and then back at his mom. “What about my homework?” he asks in a small voice.

“You don’t need to worry about that today, sweetie,” Kate smiles unconvincingly at her son. “Leave your backpack here and enjoy your time with your brother, alright?”

“Okay…” Adam agrees reluctantly.

Sam is also reluctant. He has been alone in his room for more than an hour where he could think things over and… he doesn’t think he’s comfortable with this whole scenario. It’s weird that Kate would put her nose in what is basically Sam and Dean’s problem. If they really had a problem with John, they would talk to him. It’s just that they know the whole situation is a lost cause, so… why create any more shit?

Sam is very close to just staying in with Adam and tell Kate to knock it off. But then he gets a good look at the woman as she glares daggers at John and he instantly knows that there’s nothing he can possibly say that’ll change her mind. Escaping the premises is his best bet at the moment.

“Come on, Adam,” Sam urges when the kid takes his sweet time dropping his backpack in the closet.

Adam insists on giving one more hug to his mother and then, finally, they leave the house. They barely have time to take a few steps away from the front door before they hear a high-pitched scream from inside.

“YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU!”

Adam looks at Sam with wide eyes, his bottom lip trembling slightly. Sam puts a hand on the kid’s shoulder, prompting Adam to walk faster. “Let’s go,” Sam urges.

Adam sniffs but nods. Sam sighs, annoyed at the whole situation. How did this day even come to be? It had started so well, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delai! I work very hard lately and so, when it's time to write, I don't have much energy left! But I will have more time soon.
> 
> I can already see the end of the story coming! There are still quite a few chapters to go through, but, for once, I know exactly what is left to write.
> 
> Now, someone has introduced me to Tumblr and I will use the plateform to keep people updated on my progress in my writing. My name is sohama-p. And if no one goes to read it, well... At least writing the posts will feel like a commitment to myself!


	14. Calm Before the Storm

Sam keeps his hand on Adam’s shoulder as they walk to where Dean works. The walk is long and awkward. Adam keeps crying silently, not saying a word, and Sam isn’t sure if he should try to talk to the kid or not. He hasn’t ever taken care of a child, so he really doesn’t know what he should do.

That is one of the reasons why Sam is trying to get to Dean as fast as possible. Dean has taken care of his brother. He has experience. He’ll know what Adam necessitates. Plus, Sam needs his daily dose of Dean. It’s hard to believe that they woke up together this morning in the hotel room, feeling happy and sated.

It’s only once the garage comes into view that Sam feels like he can finally breathe.

“There we go,” Sam mutters to Adam. “We’re almost there.”

The head towards the back door where they can hear big machines running. Sam goes inside without any hesitation, dragging the small boy behind him. He weaves between a few cars and a few employees that know him before finally finding his big brother.

“Hey, Dean!” Sam calls out as he approaches.

Dean looks up from the tire he’s trying to repair, and a smile blooms on his face at the sight of Sam. “Hey, Sammy.” Then, his eyes fall on Adam, making him frown. “Is everything alright?”

Sam shakes his head discreetly, though, by the red, teary eyes on Adam’s face, it is quite clear that there is a situation. “Are you done soon? Kate gave us some money so that we can eat out and go to the movies.”

Dean nods slowly, understanding that the house is a war zone at the moment. “I just need to finish with this tire and then I’m done.”

“Alright, we’ll wait for you outside.”

Sam leaves Dean there, and walks out of the garage with Adam. The boy still hasn’t said a word and Sam feels every second ticking by. Thankfully, Dean walks out of the garage shortly after and Sam feels his muscles relax from his tense position. Dean discreetly runs his fingers down Sam’s hand before turning to the young boy.

“You okay, kid?” Dean asks Adam.

The boy shrugs, his eyes unfocused on the ground. Dean frowns before glancing at Sam. The teen shrugs, not knowing what to do.

“I… uh… told Kate a few things that happened with dad when we were young. She, um, didn’t take it well?” Sam informs his big brother quietly, trying to not disturb the kid.

Of course, Adam hears everything and it seems to bring him back from wherever his thoughts had brought him to. “Do you think mom will leave dad? After all those years? She seemed  _ really  _ mad.”

Dean gives the boy an awkward side hug. “I don’t know, buddy. I don’t know. But let’s not think about that. How about we go see a movie?”

Adams nods though it’s clear he’s not feeling any better. Sam, for his part, is simply happy that Dean is taking care of the situation, helping Adam as best as he can. And Dean just wants to avoid any emotional or awkward talk with the young boy, hoping he can distract Adam long enough for Kate to do all the damage control. And so they all walk to the closest movie theater, the three of them stuck in their thoughts.

***

The action packed movie was a great opportunity to just leave the real world behind for almost two hours, and the three brothers were glad for it. It couldn’t last however and they all come back to reality once the credits roll down the screen.

Dean, feeling that they need to get a move on, quickly walks out of the movie theater with Sam and Adam in tow. He heads to the closest restaurant he sees, a family dinner. The kind of place he used to go to to beg for scraps in exchange for a few odd jobs when there really hadn’t been any money left to feed Sammy and him.

Once they all enter the family dinner, a young waitress leads them all to a booth, her eyes lingering on Sam all the time.

“If you need anything,” the waitress says as they all sit down, Adam on one side with Sam and Dean on the other, closer than they probably should be in public, “my name is Melissa and I’ll be happy to help you.”

She then gives them their menus, her eyes once again on Sam, before leaving. Dean kind of feels frustrated because, hey, Sammy is his. He’d like to make the message real clear, but… yeah. With how close Sam is voluntarily sitting next to him, Dean guesses it’s kind of hard to make this any clearer without scarring Adam for the rest of his life.

“She’s in my class,” Sam mutters at him, sensing Dean’s thoughts as he opens his menu.

Dean is tempted to ask a few more questions, like, has this girl been running after Sammy? Or has she been looking at him from afar? He really wouldn’t blame the girl for having a crush on the teen. But Dean keeps his mouth shut. He has always been nosy about his brother’s life and overly protective. It’s different now though. Dean wants to make sure the girl doesn’t even dare put her eyes on Sam ever again and he’s smart enough to realise that this isn’t healthy behaviour. Hopefully, with time, he’s going to get better at controlling how possessive he feels towards Sam.

Adam, meanwhile, is very useful as a form of distraction. “Did you find what you want to order, kiddo?” Dean asks, pushing his other thoughts away for now.

Adam still hasn’t opened his menu. He’s just staring at it blindly. Dean’s voice seems to startle him however, making the boy jump and look at the brothers. “What?”

Dean sighs, annoyed. But, as much as he hated Adam when he first met the boy, he can’t ignore the small part of him that is slowly starting to grow fond of Adam. He doesn’t quite understand how it happened, but he isn’t going to think about it too much either.

“Did you find what you want to order?” he repeats.

“Oh, uh…” Adam blinks once before lifting the menu closer to him. “I’m looking.”

Dean sighs a second time, tiredly. He can’t wait for this evening to end. Actually, he just wants to be alone with Sam so that they can talk and… yeah, maybe just have some fun. He’s tired of having to deal with other people and their problems, especially problems that have a link with their father.

Dean is startled out of his train of thoughts when the waitress comes back to take their orders. Dean tries to ignore how the girl keeps her eyes focused on Sam, though it definitely is hard to do so. He might speak louder when it’s his turn so that the girl’s attention is more on him, but he’s never going to admit that.

Finally, the waitress leaves them and silence falls over the table. The awkwardness is quite palpable now that they’re all just staring at each other. Sam quickly stands up, snatching a newspaper from another table before sitting down once more, effectively cutting himself away from Dean and Adam.

It takes a few minutes of painful staring before Adam finally asks a question that has clearly been on his mind.

“Is dad a bad man?”

Sam takes a sharp intake of air while Dean simply freezes. How the heck are they supposed to answer that?

“Uh…” Dean edges, looking at Sam for help, but the teen is resolutely keeping his eyes on the newspaper. So Dean guesses he’s on his own. “Uh…”

“It’s more complicated than that,” Sam eventually murmurs when the seconds are starting to grow too long.

The simple comment is enough to help bring Dean’s thoughts in order, and Dean discreetly squeezes Sam’s knee, grateful. “Yeah. Dad is… a bit of both, you know?”

Adam sits up straighter, clearly eager to know more. Dean licks his lips nervously. He doesn’t want to give a bullshit answer, knowing it’s just going to confuse the boy at this point. At the same time, he doesn’t want to change Adam’s opinion of John too drastically because Adam does love their father.

“Dad helped a lot of people and he’s totally badass. He saved a lot of lives. But…” Dean pauses there, hesitating a bit.

“But?” Adam prompts, eyes as big as saucers.

“But he wasn’t good to Sammy and me,” Dean says, thinking _ fuck it _ . It’s not like there’s any way he could somehow minimize the whole ordeal.

“What did he do?” Adam asks immediately, showing how young and oblivious he truly is with this impulsive and hurtful question.

Dean has to force himself to stay silent for a second because his first reaction would be to lash out at Adam. Not to hurt the young boy but to protect himself. However, it would be incredibly mean and it wouldn’t help the situation at all either. “Well... He…”

Dean doesn’t really know how he should continue that sentence, and from the glance Sam throws him, he understands that he shouldn’t give any real example at this point. After all, Adam now knows about John not being a saint, he doesn’t need to know how John basically abused his own kids.

“Bad things,” Dean finally settles on.

This makes Adam’s eyebrows scrunch together in curiosity and frustration. “Yeah, but what?” he insists.

Dean feels himself tensing. He looks directly into the kid’s eyes and says very seriously, “Bad things, Adam. Now stop asking questions.”

Adam shrinks down, feeling slightly intimidated by his older half-brother. The awkwardness doesn’t get a chance to truly settle itself at the small table as Melissa arrives at that moment to bring the hot plates to the three brothers. The distraction comes as a relief to all of them while the waitress carefully puts the plates down.

“Is there anything else I-” Melissa starts to say, her eyes on Sam again and Dean snaps.

“ _ No _ . We’re fine.” he glares at the girl, making her flush before leaving.

Sam knocks his leg against his older brother’s, silently scolding Dean but the man can’t feel guilty right that moment. Dean ignores the two other people at his table, pulling his plate closer to him. He brings the burger he ordered to his mouth and happily bites down.

Sam and Adam follow suit, the silence slightly awkward but not too overwhelming. The young boy seems to be stuck in his thoughts once more, while Sam keeps his eyes on the newspaper he’s still holding, eating his salad absent-mindedly.

Dean lets his thoughts drift, focusing on the profile of his beloved brother as subtle as he can when the teen suddenly tenses. Immediately, Dean knows Sam is going to tell him something he might not really want to hear. His appetite slowly dying, Dean chews the last few bites of his meal with difficulty, waiting for Sam to finish reading whatever article that has caught his attention.

“Dean,” Sam whispers urgently, shoving the newspaper at his brother.

Dean sets the paper on the table so that he can have a better look. Adam looks on curiously, his food forgotten. The young boy grows confused when he doesn’t see anything alarming on the paper. Dean, however, knows what article Sam wanted him to read and he feels himself tensing up.

“Oh shit…” Dean mumbles as he reads the whole thing. He can’t say that he’s surprised. The kind of shit he’s reading happens all the time, he knows. It’s the timing that alarms him, because, well, how are they supposed to approach this? Should they go see their dad, like they always do? Or should they do this alone? They have enough experience to hunt ghosts on their own.

“What’s wrong?” Adam asks.

Dean looks up at the kid before folding the newspaper and throwing it away on the table beside them. “Stupid kids doing stupid stuff. Are you done eating?”

Adam knows that he’s being placated, but he nods nonetheless, his plate mostly empty. The three brothers leave the restaurant after having paid for their meals, and they walk silently down the road towards the Milligan household. Somehow, this seems to be the calm before the storm.


End file.
